I just don't get it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2006
I just don't get it!
3
Wed, 08-02-2006 - 2:28pm
Don’t understand what is going on here. I got a cute email from the guy I’m dating asking when we were going to go out again…we have both been busy lately, we tried to get together on the weekend but it didn’t work out so when I responded I said “maybe we could do something this week if your not busy” and I said I was pretty much free except for Thursday cause it was my sister’s birthday. So he sends me an email later on asking if I had seen Miami Vice yet and I replied that I hadn’t. Then nothing…no further email or phone call later that night to set something up…I mean if he was really busy again this week that’s fine I don’t have a problem with that but then why the email asking me when we’d go out again and then not actually set something up? Or even just tell me this week is not good? What is going on here??
Maybe I am overreacting, it was only yesterday but I just don’t get it!
Any insight into what is going on would be appreciated…thanks for the letting me vent
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2004
Wed, 08-02-2006 - 3:47pm
OK I hope this helps. have a lot of male friends so I have picked up on a few things over the years in dating. the thing I have figured out is that when something is important to a woman and it is on her mind it is actually hard to think of other things. Our minds wander back to that topic and we have trouble letting it go until it is resolved. Men, however compartmentalize a lot more and so they might think of something ( like when am I going to see that great girl next?) and really genuinely be focused on it but as soon as they address it they can be gone for a while as they go to the next department temporarily. Doesnt mean you wont get an email tonight that is totally normal. So just sit tight. he is temporarily distracted by something else and that is probably the extent of it. How many times have us women jumped on someone with a phone call or email asking what has happened when if we had just been without internet or phone service by the grace of god during that time we wouldhave received what we wanted without provocation. I have now learned to resist the urges and just wait half a day longer than my brain wants to. It doesnt make me any less available and it allows for some breathing room between the sexes in how we deal with things.
Good luck!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2005
Wed, 08-02-2006 - 4:38pm

This sounds exactly like a guy i was dating!

Are you in boston?

Seriously though, his behavior didnt change and i couldnt deal. TOo much up in the air. I liked him too...but we werent a match

Hopefully your guy is just having some flaky moments.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2006
Wed, 08-02-2006 - 11:37pm
Wow...thanks for the insight...it is so true...our minds just don't work the same...and I know I have a problem with over analysing everything...turned out he was just super busy again he emailed me a few hours after I posted and we exchaged emails for a couple of hours...anyways he said he wanted to go grab a drink with me but had to go to his sisters for a BBQ...he also called me when he got back but I missed it. Anywyas we have plans to do something on saturday...I am totally going to remember your post and just take the extra day to breath and wait and see....thanks again :)