I need help
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I need help
| Wed, 08-18-2004 - 11:00pm |
I'm seeing this guy for a few months now and I can see a future with him. According to him, he gets a good vibe from me, he can be himself with me, he can tell me anything, that it feels like we've known each other for a lifetime already, in short that we have chemistry, and that he doesn't wanna lose me...BUT he said there's something missing, what? he doesn't know. He even told me that he want me but since he once said that he'll only go to bed with a woman he really love, he's the perfect gentleman. Yet he flirts with me and teases me.. holding my hands, hugging me, giving me a kiss on the lips whenever we're together. And he still continue to look for someone, which he doesn't know or he's just ignoring, is that it hurts me so. He said he's ready to settle down and have a family. I feel like he's stringing me along so that when he can't find that 'special' someone, then I'm good enough for him. I really like this guy, in fact I'm falling for him. I don't know if I should wait for him to wake up and look what's in front of him or just let it go and move on. We're not getting any younger anymore and I wanna have a family too. If he doesn't feel anything for me, how come when we're together he acts like he's my boyfriend?People keeps on telling me what a nice pair we make, they thought we're a couple. Help?

A good friend of mine once told me a saying that has stuck with me through my years of dating....and has seemed to work really well. That saying is as simple as:
"Don't chase 'em, replace 'em!"
This meaning, (in my interpretation of your situtation anyhow) is that if this guy is not willing to "step up to the plate" and make a well-founded commitment to you and your emotions, then he is not the one for you. If he has to second-guess whether or not to give his heart to you, would you really want a relationship with him anyhow? You may "love" him as a friend, or even more than a friend, but if the love is not reciprocating back to you, you will continue to harbor a feeling of emptiness. As they say, there are "plenty of fish in the sea" and I'm sure there is one out there that will just love you to death without reservation. Hope this helps....good luck to you! -GAPeach
The only reason he's acting the way he does towards you is that you're allowing it. He'll probably continue to act that way until his something better comes along and then he'll drop you. Do you really want to be there for that? Be glad you're not actually dating the guy- he would be stringing you along in a relationship for years probably.
So what do you need to do? YOU need to wake up and see what's never going to happen with this guy. If he's told you there's something missing- BELIEVE HIM. He's never going to find it in you. So quit letting him be all kissy wissy with you, quit talking to the creep and find yourself a real man who can appreciate all the wonderful things you bring to the table.
You don't need this frog, find your prince.