I need relationship advice! plzzzzzzzzzz
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| Thu, 10-19-2006 - 1:23pm |
hey everyone, thanx for reading this
I've been dating this guy for about a couple of months & we've been on some good dates. he's kind of hard to penetrate & yet again he speaks to me about his hard feelings of loneliness! (amazingly at the age of 24 he's had a 6-year old relaitonship & he says he really needs to feel that kind of intimacy again)
the thing about him is that, I don't know if really is interested or if he's not so much into me. sometimes I think he's got to be, 'cuz he calls me up & he's the one who suggests the dates & I'm the one who agrees :D (my free time is so little we can hardly go out & I've got old-fashioned parents who don't let me be on the phone with him so much)
but when we do go on the dates, he hardly ever ever ever touches me, now it's not like I expect heavy petting from guys when I go on a date but I don't know, it just feels a little awkward! there was one time that our conversation was about intamacy & that stuff & we got a little cosy in the taxi & he held my hand while crossing the street but that was it!
& there's something else! I guess my previous relationships have made a little too conservetive! like I never suggest going out with him 'cus I'm too afraid if he doesn't really want it & he finds it too clingy! the same thing about getting closer,(physically or vervaly) I don't want to be the one who takes the initiative step.
but I do really want to break the ice with him, but I guess I'd like to be sure of him first! how should I do that? (both reading his mind & breaking the ice I mean)
any advice is welcome :D
thanx a lot

ms.glitter...
3 somewhat related thoughts from Pianoguy:
1. Contrary to what your family or friends might have told you...MEN GET LONELY! But some find it impossible to express their 'loneliness' to a woman for fear of being perceived as a wimp! .
2. There are some women who like to be touched...and others who don't! So it's occasionally necessary for YOU to "guide our hands and fingers toward the areas of your body you'd like us to explore!" Once we have your permission...a lot of the awkwardness starts to disappear!
3. Do NOT compare previous relationships with the one you're currently in. If you're cautious or nervous about being intimate...or even permitting a man to 'touch you'...tell him (GENTLY)..."I'm not ready for this yet!" The more you express your true feelings, the easier it is for us to understand you! . :)
Pianoguy
wow thanx a lot pianoguy
but I'm even a little bit more confused!!!!! (specialy about number 3) see the thing is I do want him to get a little more intimate!
& how can I make sure he's really interested, I want to know the state of his mind! & I want to break the ice with him
ms. glitter...
PG thinks "how quickly the ice thaws" is correlated to the amount of passion a woman is willing to provide to a man!
There's absolutely no way for any of us to determine what a woman is willing to give until she reaches the moment when SHE'S COMPLETELY COMFORTABLE ENOUGH to 'let her guard down' and GO ALL THE WAY!
"How much and how soon" is really up to YOU!
Trust me on this...MOST MEN AREN'T NECESSARILY GOING TO "PUSH YOU AWAY!" But there are at least one or two of us who MIGHT ask you to...err...SLOW DOWN A LITTLE and NOT RUSH THINGS?
Hopefully this clarifies my 3rd point a little better?
Pianoguy