I'm scared this is the end

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2006
I'm scared this is the end
8
Fri, 06-22-2007 - 5:51pm

Capricorn Males- when you suddenly change?
Now he wants to quit smoking and buff up?
if you hook upwith your boyfriend (of 7 days lol) for the first time (have sex with him) and he says "love you" as he kisses you goodbye is it ok to think it means NOTHING since he was drinking alcohol a bit earlier? I think so but i want to know others opinions. I DIDNT SAY IT BACK! lol. so i'm not mad. its waaay too early for me just curious to know what people think. btw, does that mean he enjoyed the sex?

THEN: i "asked his permission" to go to this lingerie party thing that i had rsvped to like 3 months ago. it was all college althletes(i play volleyball). so ofcourse six packs and toned asses galore. lol. he said he was fine with it and so i went. i only stayed about 2 hours then left. didnt feel like i should stay more. we talked on the phone (today) and he talked about wanting to quit smoking and getting buffer. both topics he's never mentioned before except the smoking thing and he mentioned that once. i told him i dressed a bit more conservatively.

i told him i dressed a bit more conservative i spent the night with girls. only dancing with two guys which were both friends(1 football player and 1 basketball player). i left early also cuz i missed him. i told him all this which he said he appreciated it. but the whole buff up and quit smoking thing took me by surprise. i asked him what brought it on he said he just wanted to make changes and his smoking was messing up his body he used to be a lot buffer etc. im worried that this whole party thing hurt us more than i expected. :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2006
Fri, 06-22-2007 - 6:07pm

Capricorn Males- when you suddenly change?
Now he wants to quit smoking and buff up?
if you hook upwith your boyfriend (of 7 days lol) for the first time (have sex with him) and he says "love you" as he kisses you goodbye is it ok to think it means NOTHING since he was drinking alcohol a bit earlier? I think so but i want to know others opinions. I DIDNT SAY IT BACK! lol. so i'm not mad. its waaay too early for me just curious to know what people think. btw, does that mean he enjoyed the sex?

THEN: i "asked his permission" to go to this lingerie party thing that i had rsvped to like 3 months ago. it was all college althletes(i play volleyball). so ofcourse six packs and toned asses galore. lol. he said he was fine with it and so i went. i only stayed about 2 hours then left. didnt feel like i should stay more. we talked on the phone (today) and he talked about wanting to quit smoking and getting buffer. both topics he's never mentioned before except the smoking thing and he mentioned that once. i told him i dressed a bit more conservatively.

i told him i dressed a bit more conservative i spent the night with girls. only dancing with two guys which were both friends(1 football player and 1 basketball player). i left early also cuz i missed him. i told him all this which he said he appreciated it. but the whole buff up and quit smoking thing took me by surprise. i asked him what brought it on he said he just wanted to make changes and his smoking was messing up his body he used to be a lot buffer etc. im worried that this whole party thing hurt us more than i expected. :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2007
Fri, 06-22-2007 - 7:09pm
Why do you think it's hurt your relationship? What's wrong with him taking a turn to want to be healthy??
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2006
Fri, 06-22-2007 - 7:26pm
nothing. i guess it was just the fact that he mentioned this after the athlete party. im mean he knows im surrounded by 6 packs and toned ass so... lol
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2007
Fri, 06-22-2007 - 9:16pm
So it's nice that he wants to look good for you... :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2006
Sat, 06-23-2007 - 9:29am

Hey nickia, I wouldn't worry about anything except your worry wart mind. The fact that he said he loved you had nothing to do with the previous night's alcohol, I'm sure. If you didn't say it back then dont sweat it. It doesn't sound like he was put off by it.

You don't need to ask "permission" to attend a lingerie party you rsvp'ed to months ago. But...the guy friends and the dancing is the only thing I could see that could put a dent in your relationship. Dancing is your new BF's role now, not these other guys. I know it means nothing to most people but people tend to blur the lines sometimes and opposite sex friends can and do interfere with relationships. You should dress how you like to dress. I'm sure that whatever you would have worn would have been fine. You don't need to overdo the covering up.

As far as the changes this guy wants to make..maybe he's been wanting to make changes for a while but now maybe he feels more motivated since you have been in his life. If anything, my concerns would take the form of wondering if he has it in him to maintain the changes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2006
Sat, 06-23-2007 - 4:17pm
Hi! I think you're right. We haven't seen each other since Thursday and the party was thursday-friday. I think I just need to spend some time snuggling lol. I agree with 100% you said. I really feel that I do overanalyze and I'm trying not to because i dont want to damage the relationship. I am still a little put off by the not talking about our sex thing lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2007
Sat, 06-23-2007 - 5:10pm
OMG, I so very overanalyze. Mainly it occurs when there's no communication with the person, because you're left to wonder.. you're left to your thoughts. It's maddening. I hate it. Boys suck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2006
Sat, 06-23-2007 - 10:04pm
What sex thing?