Im upset...please read

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2006
Im upset...please read
2
Sun, 10-15-2006 - 11:43pm

My friend Scott's daughter is in the hospital with leukemia. He's a single dad, and we've been friends for awhile. He has this woman babysit her. It's a pretty convenient deal where she works at the same school his daughter goes to school at, so she brings her home with her every day. She has three kids of her own. And, charges him $20.00 a week. .
He tells me that they have been drinking together every Friday night at his house...just the two of them..but you know, they're just "friends". Her husband is nowhere in sight. She hires a babysitter to watch them so she can go hang out with Scott. He says he's not interested in her...I say whatever, she's interested in him.
So, now she has "marital problems" him to go pick up her kids and drive them to the hospital where she will be with HIS daughter.
This past Saturday my daughter and I went to visit Scott's daughter. The babysitter was there with her two young girls. She was ALL OVER his daughter...stroking her hair, her back, whispering to her. Her kids sat around looking so upset. She never batted an eyelash at them. Then, Scott comes back in the room and the two of them engage in a rather inappropriate conversation. The kind that makes you think that there's something going on. He still says no...I don't believe him.

By now you've probably figured out that I have an interest in him. Yes, I do...I'm getting a divorce and am very attracted to him. The whole scenario got me so upset on Saturday that I stayed up all last night and today crying and crying. I got an email from him saying that he couldn't understand why I was so upset...that she jokes around and he knows I think she likes him and that she has borderline humor, but it's never gone beyond joking even in discussion only. I'm sorry...I don't believe that and I'm crushed. What do you guys think?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 9:06am

I think Scott is emotionally involved with his babysitter and the babysitter is emotionally involved with him. I also think Scott enjoys the attention you give him and wants you to think there is nothing going on.

In which case, you need to leave these two alone to have their dysfunctional nonrelationship and find a man who is available and doesn't lie. There are plenty of them out there that won't cause you any confusion or heartbreak.

Good luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2006
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 7:05am

Well, I ended the friendship. I actually emailed him about the whole situation and used the personal approach so it wouldn't be an "attack" on him. I also gave him the option of ending our friendship which is what he chose. The strange thing is that although I was initially hurt and upset, it did feel like a weight coming off knowing that it was over. That alone was amazing to me....I guess I knew it was a bad thing and couldn't accept it until he made the decision.

On a positive note, it seems his little one is responding to the chemotherapy, which is great.

However, he has contacted a few of the folks I worked with and bad mouthed me to them. What can you do...he's obviously immature.

Thanks for listening..have a wonderful day.