Insult or compliment for a woman?
Find a Conversation
| Sun, 06-10-2007 - 11:32am |
I met a really attractive and intelligent woman at a party a few weeks ago. It was a public event at an art gallery. We had been talking for a good half hour and really seemed to be hitting it off. Then, things suddenly went downhill. I commented that she had a nice, full, hourglass figure. I thought she would take it as a compliment. Instead, she became deeply offended. She snapped, "Oh really....well perhaps I should do some plus size modeling!", and then she slapped my face and walked away. Needless to say, it was not my proudest moment ;-)
She had the classic figure of a 50's pinup - large bust, narrow waist, shapely hips/legs. I guess she had interpreted "hourglass" as meaning big/overweight/full figured. I just thought it meant shapely and well proportioned. Also, I'm wondering if she may have been hypersensitive about her figure to begin with. She was part Vietnamese and most women of that ethnic background tend to be petite. She may have always felt awkward about being so voluptuous.
My buddies had watched the scene unfold and were laughing hysterically. When I told them what I had said they shook their heads and said it was never a good idea to comment on a woman's figure, even if I thought it was complimentary. What are your thoughts on this?

Pages
I would find that comment inappropriate from someone I'd just met at a gathering like that, regardless of whether I thought it was a compliment or not.
But to slap your face over that (or anything for that matter)???? She's clearly got a screw or two loose--I think you dodged a bullet.
Sheri
stan82...
Pianoguy agrees with Sheri!
The slap wasn't necessary, but neither was your remark!
Depending upon her proportion and body weight, it doesn't require a PHD to interpret an 'hour-glass figure' as one that's PLEASING PLUMP! You might have intended it as a compliment...but you could have made a positive comment about her hair or smile instead!
Now...go stand in the corner for the next hour!
Pianoguy
(white)
<>
Well, it wasn't as if she wound up with all her might and smacked me. It was just a little, feminine slap meant to embarrass me, and I do think she was acting mostly on emotion, as she seemed genuinely offended. It's really an afterthought and I'm much more concerned that I made her so upset. However, I will never forget those agonizing moments in the immediate aftermath...the sound of her high heels hitting the hard wood floor as she walked off in a huff...the looks and stares of the onlookers as I'm standing there alone rubbing my cheek...not exactly my proudest moment, LOL.
stan_82...
Pianoguy's only other suggestion is to "try and learn from the experience" and be careful what comes out of your mouth!
Some women handle teasing or compliments very gracefully....others assume a man has "an ulterior motive!" And that's the reason you got SLAPPED!
Pianoguy
Mmmm, yeah. Even if done "femininely", hitting someone isn't appropriate behavior. I mean, even toddlers know they are supposed to "use their words", and that hitting isn't allowed!
And while your comment wasn't appropriate, either, two wrongs don't make a right!
Sheri
"Hourglass" is definitely NOT "pleasingly plump" as someone else said...but maybe that's what she thought it meant.
36-24-36
38-23-35
34-22-34...those could all be hourglass.
32-22-32
31-20-31
32-20-32...those are all preying mantises. Which some women believe that men prefer. And some men do. Gay fashion designers, mostly. (As opposed to straight fashion designers...)
<<"Hourglass" is definitely NOT "pleasingly plump" as someone else said...but maybe that's what she thought it meant.
36-24-36
38-23-35
34-22-34...those could all be hourglass.>>
Ah ok. I would estimate that she was a 36dd-26-36. She was also rather short, like 5'3", and probably about 130 lbs. Definitely a thick and curvy body type.
Pages