Introduce myself!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2006
Introduce myself!
1
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 1:30pm
Hey ya'll. I'm new so i thought i'd introduce myself. I am 18 years old. I am currently in college, working on bachelor's in psychology. I have a boyfriend of three years now. He was my "high school sweetheart" I work at a packaging and shipping store. Ok so here's my problem.... as i said i am 18 ( Brandon, my bf is 20) I get the feeling Brandon's gonna pop the question soon! I really don't know what to do. Do I want to marry him? YES!!
But i'm not sure if either one of us is really ready! How do you know? Plus we have talked about marriage ALOT in the past few months( it started with him then i got excited and have been talking his head off about it) and i'm a little afraid he might feel pressured to ask. Lately i've been trying to avoid the subject, but then he always thinks something is wrong.I've also been having some mixed feelings about our relationship lately. He is the greatest guy, I mean really in three years, he not once has done wrong to me in anyway. his downfall is he's not exactly a romantic, even though he tries. But lately I've been wondering what my life would be like if i hadn't been with him for so long. who would i be with, what different friends would i have? And also there is another guy friend of mine who i've become very close to and lately noticed how attracted I am to him. What should I do? Why am I all of a sudden having these feelings? I really love Brandon. What's wrong with me? And what should I do about the marriage thing?
Does anyone have some advice?!
Southernbelle4587
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 9:53pm

Hi southernbelle and welcome to the board!


Not only do I hope you find great help here, I also hope you decide to stick around and help others...


As for Brandon, I think when faced with the reality of being with someone for the rest of your life, it's very normal to have the questions you do. I think that's even more the case because of your age. Honestly, I'm over 30, have been married and would tell anyone under 30 to wait. I'm not saying that things will not work out, but I think a lot of growth occurs from 18 to 30 and the person you are today may not be the person you are when you're older.


That being said, I'm not sure how to advise you except for having an honest conversation with Brandon before he pops the question. Let him know how much you care and how much you'd like to take time to grow togther before taking on the responsibility of marriage. Are there any married people around you who you could get advice from? I would also suggest talking to them.


I know this isn't a perfect answer, but there really is no right answer here...


I do hope it helps. Keep us posted and I hope to see you around the board!


Kerry