A little unsure
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| Sun, 11-05-2006 - 8:08pm |
Hi. I am new to this, but wanted to get some others opinions.
I am a single mom (never married) of a 9 year old boy. I have only dated a handful of guys since he was born. I recently (only been 5 weeks) started dating this guy. He is recently divorced (only 6 months) and has a 3 year old daughter. A bit about me.....I am very independent, self sufficient, hard working, own my own house, my son is in private school, etc.
I have never had a good dating relationship. So I finally meet a really nice guy, who is romantic and likes to take care of me, bring me flowers, buys me things, says nice things about me. Just last week he told me he loved me and I couldn't respond, so I said Thank You. Those feelings for me are not there. I am comfortable when I am with him, my son and him get along, I get along with his daughter, we have similar interests and views. But my feelings for him are not the same as his for me.
He is very needy almost smothering individual. There isn't a moment that goes by that he doesn't think about me and it is not the same for me. If everything else is there, but I can't process my love for him, would I be settling if I stayed in this relationship or is it honestly too early for someone to tell?
Thank you ~

After 5 weeks, if you're feeling smothered I can't imagine it getting better. I would think over time, it may just get worse. How about talking to him in a non-confrontational manner? Let him know you like him but things are moving too fast. Do you think this would be feasable?
spurcrazy1002...
Pianoguy suggests you keep the friendship going...but don't take things up a notch for another 3 months (AT LEAST)!
The man you're seeing needs more time to get over his divorce. You need more time to sort out your feelings. And it's clear (to PG anyway) that the more time you give each other, the easier it'll be to tell if your dating will lead to something more permanent, or just a few enjoyable evenings from time to time?
S-L-O-W D-O-W-N and enjoy your moments together!
Pianoguy
This man is only divorced 6 months. He needs time to understand what happened, why it happened and to make positive changes. He should not be jumping into another relationship so soon, this explains the early "I love you" and the neediness.
I can see your point. He's a nice guy but he has some work to do.