Long Distance Relations
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| Thu, 11-11-2004 - 2:43pm |
I have been talking to this guy for the past 3 months and he seems to be the perfect guy for me. What scares me is that i feel way too much for him and I have yet to meet him. talk about long distance this is really really long distance. He is in New Zealand. Both of us have been divorced both on the cautious side. He is coming to see me in December and plans on staying for 4-5 days. If we decide to go ahead I plan on going to New Zealand in February. Then if we still move ahead with it plan on getting married in or after April. My dilema is how can I be in love with someone I haven't met. I have been stupid enough to tell him how I feel and how strongly. There was also another issue...my sister thought she would be doing me a favor by butting in and was extremely rude to him and asked him not to talk to me anymore that he was not right for me. Eversince then he has backed off. He says he cares but not sure if he loves me. Earlier on he did claim to be in love with me ...now he says he got carried away with the internet stuff and probably said stuff because he was sympathetic etc. He still wants to meet me because he feels there is a connection that could lead to more. My question is ..Am I making a mistake? How do I know if hes for real? I know he is not perfect but he is the perfect guy for me how do I make sure I do not make mistakes. How do I know what I feel for him is real and not just wishful thinking or something like that? I am confused cause I have never felt this way before. Help
Nu

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Hi
I agree I do have cause to worry and be wary. I intend to be very careful...my concern was and is the way I feel. I have never felt this strongly about anything and am wondering if I should follow my instincts just this once and see where it leads. Its scary and confusing. Follow my heart....or not is the question. I did not follow my instincts the last time and was married to a jerk for nearly 15 years don't want to make a mistake again...loose something good this time around. Am I making sense?
Nu
yes, i hear what your saying. and i understand your current and past situation and i also hear that your not wanting to make the same 'mistake' as you did in your last marriage. maybe it's because i'm not aware of what this whole martimonial thing is about, but i'm sure the other ppl will back me up when i say, if it works, we support you, but becareful and play safe. i dont think there's anything worse then rushing into a 2nd marriage only to find out things you didnt know before
just a tid bit..not only for you but for everyone else too
the divorce rate for subsequent marriages is highter than first marriages.
i learned that in my soc class last year..just be careful and think about all your options and i dont know, why dont you consider living closer for a few months before you decide to marry after meeting only a few times?
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