long term relationship
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long term relationship
| Wed, 08-18-2004 - 11:28am |
I have been with my boyfriend for over 7 years now and we have a 5 year old daughter. He has cheated on me before about 2 1/2 years ago, and I took him back. I was devasted when he did this to me. I still have some problems regarding trusting him again where women are concerned. He is gone from home 3 days out of the week due to him job as a truck driver. We do live together. He has put me through alot where women are concerned. I have an engagement ring from him, but he has yet to make a total commitment to me. I have discussed this with him, and ask him when does he plan on wanting to get married. He either avoids the question or just says soon, or tells me I need to quit nagging.
I would like to know what you think of this relationship and where is or is not going. I definately need help. I did break it off for a couple of months when he cheated on me, and when he found out that I was talking to a guy friend of mine that was interested in me, he told me that I better not do or go anywhere with him.

Usually when a man pops the question, the happy couple sets a date and they start planning. When the guy pops the question and refuses to talk about a date, he doesn't really want to get married- rather just gave the girl the ring to "shut them up". Why do I say that? I went through it myself- engaged 4 yrs.
You already have issues of trust with the guy. He probably hasn't changed his behaviour towards women, but now tells you you're paranoid and jealous, right? It's called manipulation. And the fact that he rushed to stop you from moving on with someone who would most likely treat you well, tells me that he's got control issues as well.
You deserve to be happy, not walking on egg shells. You deserve to be able to trust your mate, not wonder if they're being truthful. And your daughter deserves to grow up seeing a good solid relationship.
I don't know what advice you want, because I know that you will not leave until you are ready. But picture yourself in 5 years, do you still want to be asking the same questions?