loosers?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2004
loosers?
3
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 9:52pm
Why is it that when the relationship is not going anywhere and one of the party tries to end it the other one ignores? What part of being over is hard to understand? Why is it that there are people out there who choose to ignore the reality and choose to keep coming back when there's nothing good in it? Why can't one jusy thank the person who choose to break up and move on and find another one?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
In reply to: andesm
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 11:06pm
,
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
In reply to: andesm
Tue, 07-13-2004 - 8:17am
Not sure why your title is appropriate.

Why is it that when the relationship is not going anywhere and one of the party tries to end it the other one ignores?

***Because maybe they don't recognize that it has ended, maybe the party ending it isn't clear and is too wishy washy

What part of being over is hard to understand?

***When someone isn't concise with discussing it, vague wording, just not calling anymore

Why is it that there are people out there who choose to ignore the reality and choose to keep coming back when there's nothing good in it?

***Because maybe they don't recognize that there's nothing good in the relationship, maybe they live life through rose colored glasses and liked the relationship


Why can't one jusy thank the person who choose to break up and move on and find another one?

***LOL I highly doubt someone that is getting dumped is just going to say, hey thanks for the good times, they are hurt and their egos are bruised.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2004
In reply to: andesm
Tue, 07-13-2004 - 1:46pm
Your reality may be that it's over but his reality is that he still loves you so it can't be over and he'll make you fall back in love.

*****Guess I did not realize he's in love. I did not even know he was because he was not making time for me but he did the exact same thing you mentioned here.


When you break up with someone you have to do it kindly but give reasons and allow the other person to talk and ask questions and at least come to an understanding.

*****This is my first approach and it never worked. It's like talking to a rock. Giving him an option is what I always did and it was useless. Force break up with no fall back option is the only choice I have left and that's what I did.


But remember - if the breakup comes out of the blue for him, he thought things were great - it could be take a while for him to say to himself, "It's over" and to move on.

*****One should not be expected to stay in a relationship that is not handled with care. They should know that the length of the relationship only depends on the person's love and patience but it still lead to a break up eventually.