Make a move on my guy friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2005
Make a move on my guy friend
3
Wed, 12-21-2005 - 6:23pm

I have feeling for my friend; I know he’s attracted to me… I want to tell him how I feel or make a move on him… but am afraid. Background info: We use to work together and become good friends. During the summer he kissed me and told me that he liked me, but was he confused, he didn’t want a relationship and didn’t want to ruin our friendship. I told him that we should not get involved because 1) we worked together and 2) he was confused and didn’t want a relationship (I am looking for one)…so we decided just to remain friends…we saw each other at work and that was it…we rarely did any thing outside work together during the summer.

Then in October I left the company and we started to spend more and more time together. He asked me out for supper and a movie (it felt like a date…but he didn’t kiss me), we go out for coffee… he puts his arm around my waist, touches me, compliments my physical appearance, we flirt a lot, he treats me very well, he picks me up, pays for me and drops me off whenever we go out …but he hasn’t kissed me! A former colleague of mine asked him what’s going on with us… he told them that were just friends. I know he likes me… but what’s up with him? It’s seems it’s taking to long. Maybe he just likes my company and wants nothing else.

I’ve come to the point where I just want to tell him how I feel! I want to know how he feels! What do you think about my situation? Should I tell him how I feel and how would I tell him? Thanks for your input.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Fri, 12-23-2005 - 12:30am
His telling the other colleague that you are just friends, speaks volumes. He really likes you as a friend (nothing more). If a guy wants a relationship, nothing stops him from pursuing that relationship (even if he wasn't planning on having a r-ship). This is especially true when he knows you are interested in having a r-ship with him. And I'm sure he knows you're interested, by your actions toward him. It sounds to me like he just wants to flirt and have fun. I probably wouuldn't say anything to him at this point.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2005
Fri, 12-23-2005 - 6:00pm
You are right gingersnapelle, if he wants to be with me...we would be together. He would make an effort. I haven’t heard from him in 2 weeks and I’m not going to call him. I'm also not going to tell him how I feel because I'm sure that he know am interested in him...and by him doing nothing about that ...he's actions clearly state how he feels about me. Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Fri, 12-23-2005 - 8:09pm

I hope I wasn't too much of a hard a$$. I really hate to see nice girls, wasting too much time on a guy who just wants to have fun. I've had so much dating trial and error, I could probably write one of those dating books. But anyway, most men I know are "opportunists" and if someone is available and lets them know they like them, they jump on the opportunity at once. That is why a lot of women I know complain that:
1. the guy doesn't call enough and on weekends he's MIA or
2. He calls 100 times a day, wants to take up the girl's entire weekend plus a couple of nights a week.

Anyway, I know you'll find the right guy soon. I think this guy is too much into "friendship mode" or commitment phobic.

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