Man: asking for advice
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Man: asking for advice
| Mon, 04-19-2004 - 9:45pm |
Ive recently taken a liking to this girl whom I met over the internet (have been hanging out for about 3 months - perfect match) and am seeking some advice... I want to ask her out, but Im not sure if I want to sacrifice this sort of friendship. What should I do to make it sort of subliminal that I want to go out with her and ease into it (Im sort of a shy guy as well)... ?

She likes you...but does she like you in that way? there's only one way to know. and being shy can only take you so far before she just gets bored with waiting for you to get your nerve up...get it?
There is no such thing as a "sumbliminal" way to ask someone out. You just bite the bullet and do it and take the risks associated with it if you like her in that manner...
I hope this helps. Good luck and keep us posted.
Someone responded to you and said that women expect men to make the first move and if they don't, then they assume the man is not interested in them. I believe that is true with 99% of women. It's very possible that this woman likes you, too, and is just waiting to see if you'll make a move. You need to act quick or else A.) she'll see that you're not interested and eventually let the friendship fade away or B.) someone else will get to her.
I understand that you're shy. You don't have to show up at her place with flowers and profess your love for her LOL! Do you two go out anywhere? If not, ask her to catch a movie with you, have dinner with you, etc. If you two already go out and do things, "up" it a bit and take her to a nice restaurant (not neccessarily expensive)or offer to make dinner for her and have it by candlelight. Also, compliment her and flirt with her. Tell her she looks nice, she has pretty eyes, etc. Smile at her, look into her eyes. Touch her on her hand, her arm, etc. Put your arm around her, hold her hand, etc. If she doesn't resist, she's into you! Best of luck!
Edited 4/20/2004 4:53 pm ET ET by zurah
and she'll say sure..
"you know, I have a great time when we're together - would you like to really go out sometime?"
That way - you leave it casual but give her the idea that you have thought about making it more - if she looks uncomfortable, or says she doesn't think so - you have your answer and you can likely save the friendship because nothing awkward would have happened yet.
good luck!
You can start giving her a few subtle compliments - i.e.: tell her how pretty she looks, that any guy who dates her is lucky...
could be she doesn;t know you think she's a desirable woman, that you consider her just a friend, and that she might be interested in something more.
10:00pm (i work late and so does she) - catch a flick - she asked about The Punisher so we'll be seeing that.
Midnight (or somewhere there about) - grab a bite to eat at any good looking restaurant is open (unless she points out something different)
1:00am - back to my place to have a little bit of a painting session (I got a fresh canvas with new paints and new brushes and Ive been wanting to paint for/with her since forever).
2-3:00am - take her home and call it a night.
I was thinking about making the move during the painting... any thoughts or suggestions about the night I have planned are definitely welcome!