I have to say that when I'm still attached to someone I will keep the memento. I am still wearing it or displaying it then I am still attached. I may not necessary want to get back together but I don't want to lose this person in my life. I recently broke up with a guy but I still felt very attached to him. I felt like we weren't done. Even though I did the breaking up. I still felt connected to him. He was not just my boyfriend but my best friend. I couldn't take down the picture of us in my office. I didn't throw away the cards and gifts. We did reconnect and started hanging out. We hung out together for about 3 months when I realized why I broke up with him in the first place. At that point I knew I was done and the first thing I did was take down and store him mementos. I KNOW it's over now and those mementos only have the meaning of "It's someone from my past." So I would say he is still attached to you. By being attached does not necessarily mean still in love. So tread lightly. Sounds to me you are still attached too or you wouldn't care what he was saying, doing or wearing.
You can't move on in your life with or without him until you get this nagging issue resolved. I would make a very subtle move and see if he responds. Maybe a text that just says "Hey" or call his cell when you know he won't be able to answer and leave a message saying "Just wanted to say hi" I have a sneaking suspicion that he will call back. You two have some unresolved issues. Just ignoring them and pretending they are not there will not help either of you to get back together and/or move on from each other. Sometimes when someone is ashamed a gently encouragement is all they need to open up again. However, if the reasons you broke up with him were for serious reasons like alcohol, cheating, abuse then he will never change and will should just know that. No amount of talking and rehashing will change him.
~~He was a great boyfriend up until one bad day where he just said some really hurtful things
From what our friends have said, I think he is really ashamed and feels bad. It was one day.. albeit a really bad day, but I'd be willing to hear him out. I just can't imagine my life without knowing him and.. I dunno, maybe he feels the same way since he hasn't cut off our bracelets.. Bah!~~
You said you don't make initial contact with guys, OK...but yet you still talk to your friends about him and what he my be thinking/feeling. To me this sounds like more of a control issue than anything else. You want to have things resolved but yet you are unwilling to make a move in that direction. You can't have it both ways.
What if he cuts the bracelet off, then is it a *sign* that everything is over. You said you are still wearing yours...why not cut it off if you won't do anything to resolve the issue.
As far as wearing mementos, my ex gave me some jewelry, including two rings I wore on my left hand. The day I left him I took off the rings and put them away. I should sell the stuff on e-bay and at least get some money out of them. ;-)
When something like that happens ( a verbal explosion) you wonder if the person had been feeling these things all along and just finally let it out or is it that the person feels bad inside and wants you to feel just as bad so they say/do hurtful things to bring you down.
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I have to say that when I'm still attached to someone I will keep the memento. I am still wearing it or displaying it then I am still attached. I may not necessary want to get back together but I don't want to lose this person in my life. I recently broke up with a guy but I still felt very attached to him. I felt like we weren't done. Even though I did the breaking up. I still felt connected to him. He was not just my boyfriend but my best friend. I couldn't take down the picture of us in my office. I didn't throw away the cards and gifts. We did reconnect and started hanging out. We hung out together for about 3 months when I realized why I broke up with him in the first place. At that point I knew I was done and the first thing I did was take down and store him mementos. I KNOW it's over now and those mementos only have the meaning of "It's someone from my past." So I would say he is still attached to you. By being attached does not necessarily mean still in love. So tread lightly. Sounds to me you are still attached too or you wouldn't care what he was saying, doing or wearing.
Good Luck!
Impossible to tell.
Thanks so much for your reply.
Hi! Thanks for your response.
You can't move on in your life with or without him until you get this nagging issue resolved. I would make a very subtle move and see if he responds. Maybe a text that just says "Hey" or call his cell when you know he won't be able to answer and leave a message saying "Just wanted to say hi" I have a sneaking suspicion that he will call back. You two have some unresolved issues. Just ignoring them and pretending they are not there will not help either of you to get back together and/or move on from each other. Sometimes when someone is ashamed a gently encouragement is all they need to open up again. However, if the reasons you broke up with him were for serious reasons like alcohol, cheating, abuse then he will never change and will should just know that. No amount of talking and rehashing will change him.
~~He was a great boyfriend up until one bad day where he just said some really hurtful things
From what our friends have said, I think he is really ashamed and feels bad. It was one day.. albeit a really bad day, but I'd be willing to hear him out. I just can't imagine my life without knowing him and.. I dunno, maybe he feels the same way since he hasn't cut off our bracelets.. Bah!~~
You said you don't make initial contact with guys, OK...but yet you still talk to your friends about him and what he my be thinking/feeling. To me this sounds like more of a control issue than anything else. You want to have things resolved but yet you are unwilling to make a move in that direction. You can't have it both ways.
What if he cuts the bracelet off, then is it a *sign* that everything is over. You said you are still wearing yours...why not cut it off if you won't do anything to resolve the issue.
As far as wearing mementos, my ex gave me some jewelry, including two rings I wore on my left hand. The day I left him I took off the rings and put them away. I should sell the stuff on e-bay and at least get some money out of them. ;-)
I never ask about him with our friends ever, but they feel the need to bring him up at times LOL
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