men are difficult to read!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2004
men are difficult to read!!
3
Sun, 12-05-2004 - 1:15pm

exactly, how do you read a man???

when a guy is interested in you, will he take his time in his approach and not hunt you down too quickly? Or, will go he for the catch right away and just show you that he's interested?? how can you differentiate between the guy who only wants a*s, and the other who is geniuinely into you???

right now, i really dont know how to interpret my Mr.X. I met him through a mutual friend, and since our first meeting, we've somehow exchanged numbers and have hung out together with a either group of friends, or by ourselves as well. however, last thursday - he kissed me and we ended up heavily (but only) making out. the following day, i text messaged him, and he didnt reply. then he called me a couple days later acting casual but very nice. bored and hyper at work, i text messaged him the next day. again, no reply from him. but then just as i was about to give up hope on this guy, after ive already posted a msg about him and after ive already decided that hes not interested - he calls me again this past friday! the night that we *hooked* up, Mr.X says to me: "i think you and i should hang out more often - but in a dating kinda way." - well, barely calling me and not responding to my text messages - isnt quite dating!! im pretty certain that he will call again at some point, but, what should i make out of all of this???

im not looking for something serious with him, but, hes a great guy whom i would like to get to know better...sometimes it seems like he is interested, and at other times - i have no clue what his intentions/interests are....

so, HOW DO YOU TELL??? any insight? any advice? furthermore, how should *I* act now??? like im interested or should i blow him off??

thanks in advance,
eeksj

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2004
Sun, 12-05-2004 - 1:53pm

Ee i completely sypmpathise! In the same situation as you, cant read this guy who was the one to ask for my number, then he didnt text, then i spoke to him, got his number texted him, he acted casual and left it a little while then said yes to a drink, all went well - or so i thought, texted him twice since then to ask if he wants to do it again - no reply, saw me but didnt speak to me the other day when i walked down the road and he was going up it, yet still stares when he sees my car and keeps looking over!! -although he is off travelling - but still! I have NO clue why men behave the way they do - and your chap sounds like the one i've just said! I think he is interested in you but doing that I'm going to act completely casual and play it cool thing, hence the 'in a dating kind of way' that he said - does he actually know what he wants? - He does sound a little mixed up..........Sorry - this probably hasnt helped at all - but maybe leave it a little while if he isnt replying and see what happens?(As hard as that's gonna be for you) I do think he is otherwise he wouldnt of given you his number etc and got yours.....but the next move should be his, he knows you like him......let us know how it goes!!

Alice x

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Sun, 12-05-2004 - 2:05pm

Do you know for a fact that he got your text message? If not, ask him! Some people are technologically-shy. Also, from what it sounds like, this guy sounds interested. He's telling you he'd like to date so now it's just up to you to show positive reinforcement...

I would layoff the text messaging. If you want to speak with him, call him. Try to drop your expectations of how often he should call--if you guys are in the beginning stages, then every few days is fine. Take it S-L-O-W and go from there...

Hope this helps. Keep us posted.

 

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 12-05-2004 - 2:26pm

No, they're really not ;-).

A man who is truly interested in you romantically, who is emotionally healthy, and who is available for a r'ship, will make that interest clear by asking you out for a date. If you have to wonder, then he's not all that interested.

With this guy, I wouldn't initiate any more contact. If he calls but doesn't ask you out, then I'd move on.

Sheri