Mixed signals ..advice please

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2007
Mixed signals ..advice please
3
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 1:10am

Can anyone help! I'm 26 and jumping back into dating after a 3 years away and now this guy is driving me crazy!

Since before New Year a spark struck up between me and this guy. I see him a couple of times a week in passing (he works in security for a company I visit), he's asked me out a couple of times in a round about way ( we should meet up etc) but I didn't want to pursue it so didn't commit to a time or a place.... every time I see him he always tells me how beautiful i am and holds my hand... yep a bit of a smooth talker. So a few weeks ago he asked me again to stop by at his work and hang out ... I decided that he seemed like a nice guy I wanted too, but his shift clashed with mine, so in passing one day, I gave him my number and told him to call me if he wanted to go out, because hanging out at work wasn't going to happen.

I've dated people who were less pleased to get my number, he seemed happy and with in a few mins he called me so I had his number... I tried to be all cool ( Which I think came off as a bit of a cold.. it was a 30 second conversation, where i told him if he wanted to go out with me he should give me a call ... same response 'ok beautiful'!

He's the weird part .... its been two weeks and nothing!! I text him a week ago to see if he wanted to go the movies - and nothing. When I saw him last, there was no smooth talk no hand holding, I asked if he got my text message, but apparently he hasn't got that feature on his phone. So he said he would call me in the next couple of days.

That was last week and still no phone call? So now i'm sooo mixed up .... I don't know if my nerves have caused me to be a bit too cold with him ( I am really shy and I do try to keep things short and sweet just because its at work) or has he just played me.

I really want to ask him whats going on ... Ladies is it wrong if I leave it for a few more days and then try calling him ? I figure if I call him - at least I can say I tried instead of wondering what would happen if I don't??

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Tue, 03-13-2007 - 7:55pm
I saw that you never received a response on this one. Are there any updates or would you still like some advice?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Thu, 03-15-2007 - 12:12pm

sorry dear, in my humble opinion i would say he was just playing a stupid game.

he only wants to have 'the chance' but he does not pursue it.

if he would really care he would have called or given an excuse for not calling.

thank him for being an idiot early in the dating game.
be glad you did not waste more time, effort and emotions on this person, you deserve better.

keep your head up,
penelope

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2006
Thu, 03-15-2007 - 12:44pm
My opinion: Don't bother asking him anything because that will only inflate his ego. You gave him your number and he knows that you're interested. His flirting was just a game, to see how far he could go. Now the thrill of the chase is over. Don't give him the satisfaction that you even gave him that much thought. Never mention it, unless he does. Even then your only response to him should be....." Oh! you didn't call, I didn't even notice" and go about your business.