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| Sun, 01-15-2006 - 5:30pm |
Hi all,
I had written before about this party, where we exchanged glances all evening. I came to know later he has a GF! :-( But I couldn't get him out of my mind. Well, all I can imagine now is being casual and friendly. But the attraction is undeniable.
Just on a lark, I looked up the local phone directory, and found a number n address!
After much deliberation......and also, on an impulse, this morning, I dialled the number.
I was soooooooo nervous!
I spoke to him! But it was soo embarrassing....coz when I gave him some clues about me...and said we had seen each other that night at the party, he said he couldn't remember!! I wanted to be swallowed by the ground at that time! :-)) I mentioned "pictures" and the next thing he says is why don't I send him a picture from that night, and he gave me his e-mail address! I immediately sent him my pic, and he said "Yes, now I remember". well, thank god! :-)) I wonder if he really did not remember when he said he did not.
There were some very awkward silences....on the phone. He would ask "what else" now and then, and I would laugh softly n nervously. I just felt shy. We exchanged some background information about each other. He was aking me questions about me, which I am glad he did. Then someone called his name in the background (he lives with his brother) and I said after a while "do you need to go?" and he said "kinda". I said "feel free to call me anytime u wish. u have my number." i am glad in a way that he did not just say it right out that he needs to go. (or maybe i am reading too much).
After that phone call, I wrote him a super short email saying it was nice talking to him.
His response within minutes: an email, an automated messenger invite from him, for online talks. (no personal message)
What does this mean...?
Is this a sureshot sign of interest?
Is he being just polite, or does this look like more?
What do you think he thought when I called....
Did he think I was crazy...? or over-eager? (guys, do you think that i showed too much eagerness?)
(i did try my best to sound very casual....but I wonder if I gave off another vibe unknowingly).
Any input would help.....
I am scared. He has a GF :-(
How should I proceed henceforth.
Withdraw a little?
Not talk often?
Ofcourse, it would all also depend on whether he does like me to begin with, even if it is as a "friend".

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True.
bnaka,
Sorry, but I joined this thread late. If you stick around this guy long enough, you will be setting yourself up for a BIG letdown. This guy is probably flattered that you are paying attention to him, but he will either do one of two things.
a) eventually tell you he can't be friends, because of his gf. Since he feels the need to tell his gf about your friendship, she most likely would tell him to cut off the friendship with you (if she's normal).
b) have an affair with you on the side. That is not a good idea, because at the end of the day, he will be with his gf, and you will be left out in the cold.
Use your new-found date initiation skills on a nice single guy, who can be a great bf for you.
I totally understand your message and can understand why you think it was totally wrong to do what she did, but personally I have always felt that nobody can take what is yours.
If someone is totally in love with someone or truly committed to someone they would not do this. I have seen this in my life, where guys who were taken would have to tell girls to stop chasing them or contacting them. I have seen guys who have girlfriends do nothing when "strange" girls call them or give them their numbers. I have seen angry married men tell woman to stop pursuing them. Of course this does apply to all men, but I HAVE seen this.
This guy in particular actually talked to her, even called her...what does that say about him? He has a girlfriend, he did tell her he had one, yet he kept the conversation going and even meet with her. Why did he offer, why not simply do small talk with her and block her phone and stop taking her calls?? It does take TWO to tango you know....
I'm sure you've also heard the expression "two wrongs don't make a right."
Who knows why he did what he did. Maybe he thought he could have an easy piece on the side; maybe he innocently thought he was just making a new friend. I don't know what kind of association they met through, but perhaps he joined it to network and he thought he was networking/establishing a business contact.
It really doesn't matter though. The real question is why is the OP pursuing a taken man?
If what she wants is a real relationship, then pursuing unavailable men is not going to get her what she wants.
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