multiple lives

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2004
multiple lives
2
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 4:53pm
I was watching this TV show the other day about a so called perfect guy. The point to the story is this - somewhere out there, there are people who works more than one job, those who have confidential job, those who work 3 jobs, or simply living multiple lives.

How can we protect ourself from being a victim of those who lives multiple lives (hopefully not multiple wives :-)?

How does one really know who they are dealing with on the first 2 or 3 dates?

How can anyone love someone who has many secrets?

Do this so called "perfect guy" deserve less because they are not normal?

With the world being so full of pretention, secrets, and many other dramas, how do we know who to trust?

We could all hope for a good instinct but not everyone has that gift.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
In reply to: andesm
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 9:26pm
Hello again andesm!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: andesm
Fri, 05-28-2004 - 1:47pm
I thought I found my "soulmate"...he was a guy who led a life similar to what you are refering to. Work had him leaving at a moment's notice and he never knew where he was going or when he was coming back. He looked different - different eye and hair colour, etc. I trusted him...I didn't ask about his secrets and didn't care. I knew how I felt and that was fine. But I realized after 3 yrs that I wasn't fully able to trust him with my heart. I couldn't trust that my future would be fulfilled with him. Much as I loved him, I deserve more. Your question "does he deserve less" is absurd bc life is about choices and he made his choices. He chose that career and thus he knew the consequences. And I must make my choices and I have.

These questions are very generic tho and every person has to make their choices - to fulfill their own needs. Mine could not be met in these conditions you describe. I can honestly say I "tried" and I know.

Go.