my confused boyfriend

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2004
my confused boyfriend
3
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 1:25pm
its been 4yrs since i am in this relationship, we belong to different community.We both love each other very much and want to get married. but the problem is his parents, they are very much against and also trying to change his mind, we both after deciding tried to convince his parents but they in turn started begging me and started blaming me that i have trapped their son, he always defended me before my parents and for that also his parents started blaming him. now even though he has started avoiding his parents still his other relatives are trying to confuse him.we are in the process of planning for marriage, he has taken visa appointment also,but even today when he says that he is not able to decide i get upset,its not the first time he is saying that, we have argued many a time over this and both tried to end the relationship but we both are so close that all our effort goes in vein, we both know the truth that we can not stay with out each other we have gone thro the pain of separation also, but at the same time he feels that he should not hurt his parents,we both decided for marriage in November this year,now i have started feeling that he will leave me, i know the intensity oif this relationship but iam not able to trust him,he remains confused all the time and he also confuses me

pls help me i dotn know what to do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 1:55pm
I think you need to decide what you really want and stick with it. If he cannot make up his mind then it's really best for you two to not be together. If you are truly important to him he will stay with you despite the family disagreements. I think you should explain that to him. It's not right to live in such stress all the time. It's not worth it!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 2:21pm
How old are you two, and why are his parents so against him marrying you?

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2004
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 3:22pm
hi

thnx for responding, well whtever u said v both understand tht very well, actually in tha last 8months we had breakups alomost every week, the maxwe stayed without talkin was jst 1 week, n once we get to talk it goes on, in his community, the general attitude of parents is gettin their kids married bt nt bothrd abt their happiness n future. his parents r more worrid abt their image in society

rgds

sumi