My mind is going crazy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2006
My mind is going crazy!
3
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 4:34pm

I picked frazzled as my emoticon cause thats what i am...

HELP!

I met my boyfriend through a friend and we started initially talking to eachother online. He's across the country from me, and we had talked for about 5 months before we met. We have been together 6 months after that and its going well. Ive been there four times to see him and hes come over here once. We've both met each others parents and im not sure if his parents really like me. I feel upset because he hasnt tried to come over here and am unsure whether its cause he doesnt want to make the effort or if my living situation (i live with my folks) is the cause... Also... dun dun dun.. Hes more to the problem..

Im only 22 and im trying to get my work situation straightened out. Hes told me that hes in the relationship for the long run but i feel very weary and torn because two years is a LONG time. I feel that being in this relationship might now work and its making me feel very down. He's the first that ive truly opened up to but it feels so on edge because of the distance. When we are close to eachother, we are perfect. Even when we fight it doesnt feel horrible. However, I am planning to go back to school and will take two years before i can detach from my current situation..

Also, im not sure if hes truly faithful or not. I mean it could be my paranoia cause hes really great but im just not sure. I just feel very scared that he will hurt me because i havent had this type of connection with anyone..

I guess im just feeling really torn from the logistics and dont know how to relax. Hes a great guy but i get stupid suspicions of him cheating or just falling out of the relationship.. Im not sure how to deal with it..

Has anyone, or is anyone in this type of situation? How did you deal with it? Any advice?

Sorry if everything is jumbled.. Im just feeling quite overwhelmed

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 5:00pm
There is a LDR board in ivillage. I'm sure they'd help you in your current situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2006
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 5:07pm
Thanks a Lot, lightandbright. I will definitely post onto that board. I mustve missed it =)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 7:33pm

So very sorry for you. If you feel too perplexed and anxious about this man, it could mean that your intuition is telling you something.

A long distant relationship is very difficult to maintain. You may have cause to wonder if he is
socializing with other women and dating them, or if he is lonely or in need of sex, would he date others? He may have the same reason to wonder about you.

As far as living with your parents, he shouldn't be upset about that. If you can't make it on your own as yet, why shouldn't you live with your parents?

Honey, this can't be the best relationship for you, because you are terribly unhappy and apprehensive about it.

It would be better to move on and once you enter college, you are going to come into contact with other men and be tempted to have companionship.

However, you must weigh the advantages of staying in this relationship or the disadvantages. good luck