my rant- please be patient
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my rant- please be patient
| Fri, 08-20-2004 - 11:11am |
My b/f of 1.5 yrs, is going on his company's lunch cruise next week, where employees are allowed to take kids/spouse etc. And he is not taking me! I made quiet a ruckus over this last night. I even went as far as hinting that we should break up. He said I'm blowing this out of proportion, since It's just a lunch till evening cruise, and he didn't think it was a big deal. But since he saw how upset I was, he asked if I want to take off from work, and come with him to the cruise. However, the fact remains, I already know he doesn't want me there, so I told him it's too late. Now I don't know if this is PMS talking, or if I really have a valid claim to be angry. My b/f is not perfect, but he is a really great guy, to me at least. He lets me to be me, patient, independent, reliable, and always encourages me to tell him what bothers me. During the time I typed this posting up, there were seconds when I feel silly for being bothered abt this. But there are times that I think I have the right to be pissed off. What gives people? THanks for reading...

Nessa
It does seem a bit odd (to Pianoguy anyway) that the invitation wasn't extended to you!
BUT...owing to the fact that you would have to "take time off from work" in order to go on this lunch cruise...your b/f might have assumed this 'non-emergency' would tick off your employer? It's also possible that he may have wanted to "hang out alone" with his co-workers.
Are you worried that your b/f might be interested IN a co-worker...and this might be an opportunity to see her? You've indicated your b/f is a "great guy", lets you be yourself and on top of this...HE STILL LOVES YOU! And while you can always blame PMS (or even the tooth fairy), your behavior and verbiage leave a lot to be desired!
To be honest...ANY WOMAN who would break up a great relationship because of a stupid luncheon cruise...really shouldn't be seeing anybody! And if the truth were known, I'll bet your b/f has been more than a little angry with your past behavior, but has kept his mouth shut about it!!!
Pianoguy thinks you owe him an apology....RIGHT NOW!
You're feeling left out, aren't you? Well did you ever stop and ASK your bf why he didn't ask you to go? Why did you just jump to conclude he didn't WANT you to go? Since you mentioned that you would have had to take time off work to go, did that not occur to you that he didn't want to intrude on your work? Maybe YOUR work ethic says "it's ok to just ditch out of work for something better" but HIS says, "you're got to work, you only leave if there's an emergency or you're sick".
Don't be blaming anything on PMS. YOU overreacted on the poor guy and YOU owe HIM an apology. I'm surprised that he put up with that! Is that how you want to run things? Pout and throw fits to get your way?
Next time you feel upset about something this guy has or hasn't done, stop and A)take stock of the situation, B)take stock of your reaction and C)ask him his motivations.
But maybe what's really going on here is that you're trying to find any excuse to break up with the guy, so you're going to jump on anything he says or does. Would you have been upset with him if he HAD asked you in the beginning because you DO have to work and how could he be so inconsiderate to even ask? I think this guy is fighting a losing battle and would never win no matter what he tries. If you're that unhappy and looking to pick fights, let him go. Allow him the chance to move on and yourself to find someone who you don't want to pick on.
Naah, I am not blaming my behavior on PMS. I realize I was being unfair to him. I just want to know if it's just me or anyone else would be upset (not necessarily react the same way) if their b/f not invite them to a luncheon cruise. I threw the PMS thing out there, because my cramp's really KILLING me *auch*
Alison: "Would you have been upset with him if he HAD asked you in the beginning because you DO have to work and how could he be so inconsiderate to even ask?"
My reponse: Geez... Im not that crazy =) If that was the situation, I would've thanked him and tell him to enjoy himself. But other than that, I understand what you're trying to tell me. Points very well taken =)
Pianoguy: you made a good point, that perhaps I am feeling a insecure abt him not extending the invitation to me. But it's not because I think he's snooping around. Noo I trust the guy =) I don't know what my motivation was to be that upset, but I do very much feel left out. That's all.
Thanks again everyone =)