need advice...is he worth it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2004
need advice...is he worth it?
2
Sat, 10-02-2004 - 3:44pm
Ok, it's been a while since I have dated, 3 years. I have just become recently single, 2 months ago and I have kind of hooked up with a guy from work. I have known him for about 4 years and we have talked on and off. He has asked me out before, but I always had a BF. Now that I am single we met up at a work function last night. He showed up we talked on and off, he was sweet and we ended up going to another place, just him and me. We exchanged phone numbers, he started with his and then asked for mine. Well, I went back to his house and we started fooling around, his phone rang and a girl left a message, he told me that it was his gf, but that he was on the outs with her and just needed to tell her goodbye. I told him that I wasn't going to have sex with him as long as he had a gf. I ended up staying the night, but we did nothing more than fool around. I told him to get himself single then maybe I would think about having sex with him, but not until then. He said, ok, I'll consider it. He also told me that he didn't want a one night stand with me, cause he just couldn't do it and he wanted me stay with him cause he felt comfortable and just hated sleeping alone. He has a friend through work who I also know and the night before we had discussed trying to get this friend to go out, cause he liked to sit at home all the time and we want him to get out and have some fun. Well, before I left this morning, he said to me. Hey, I will see if roger wants to go out tonight and I will call you. I said ok and then I left. Ok....Um....I need some advice with all the information that I have given, what does everyone think?? Did I do the right thing?? Is this guy worth anything???
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-03-2004 - 3:37pm
hadcmane...

After reading your post twice, the only song Pianoguy had running through his head was "I'M EASY" (sung by Keith Carradine in the Robert Altman movie: "NASHVILLE!")

For a girl who has only been on one date with this man, you certainly don't waste any time, do you? It would've been better if you had stopped at "the phone number exchange" instead of returning to his place to "fool around!" Guess what?

You're dealing with "a player!" The cue was the phone call from the g/f...and that's when you should've said GOOD NIGHT and gone home. But golly gee...this man couldn't possibly sleep by himself in the same bed...so it was nice of you to...err...share it with him!

Consider this....if he dumped his g/f for YOU....how long do you think it would take for him to 'cheat' again with somebody else? Your 'would-be boyfriend' uses women like toilet paper! Once the roll is empty...he finds a new one! Quite a catch, huh?

Pianoguy



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-03-2004 - 5:28pm
If my boyfriend had another woman over at his apartment and he thought that he could justify it because we were in the middle of an argument, I would dump him on the spot. It wouldn't matter to me that he hadn't actually slept with her, but flirting, being on a date, and having her over for the night?? Not what I want in my partner.

Take a really good luck at this guy. And dump him.

Your behavior is fine...you didn't fool around with him when you had someone in your life...but he does. Keep to your standards...what's good enough for you, should be good enough for him.