In need of Help

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2005
In need of Help
17
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 1:58pm
I am in need of help its been a few years since i last dated. So i was out on a Sunday night and met someone. Had a nice time no numbers exchanged and so on. Nice flirting and conversation. A few days later he came back in and asked one of my friends where i was. So
my friend called me and the new guy left a message. Not many men have come looking for me and asked someone they did not know where I was. The message he left did say I came to see you and your not here a few times?
So I came out and hung out with him and 2 of his friends for a few hours. Both nights at the end of the night he kissed me goodbye. This 2nd night he says you have my number call me. So I called the next night, nothing, the next day called and he was too busy to talk. Next night called to invite him out and something like you told me to call so i am? The next day he sent a text message saying he was busy when I had called the other day and was getting wet on his bike. Well I didn’t respond to the text until 9 hours later when I went out. I texted him to tell him I was out and he texted me he was in the same town and at another spot. So I texted later if you get a chance swing by. Nothing. So im not sure what all is going on or how I should do things. Some men like the chase, some like to be chased. Im not a game player when it comes to things. Im not clingy i dont want someone around all the time. He did make a big jump by going to a place and asking a total stranger if i was coming. He had no idea who this person was. So he went out of his way and i did my part by calling. I left the i had a nice time and stuff on the voicemail. Im just not used to this nor do i have time with the holidays here and im going out of town in a few days. Im not used to having instant chemistry with someone.


Edited 12/17/2007 3:29 pm ET by cherry0125

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 3:27pm
Don't aplogize, just let it go and try to be a little more patient in the future.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 6:39pm

I said "if"... and I still stand by my answer...men have done this to women I have known...testing them taunting them ... to see if they lose control.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 6:43pm

If the actions and words dont match..then the words arent sincere.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2005
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 7:22pm
Trust me i understand. I know i showed weakness and what not by calling and texting. But im not a waiter if that sounds right. I mean ok meet someone one day a few days later they come looking for you knowing that you usually are there. Fine all goes well. We leave, he says you have my number. Now that to me showed he liked the chase. Well i am aggressive but not the stalker type. I get bored of having to chase , Ive met alot of men who are intimated by me i am 5'10 wear heals and stand tall and proud and am told very attractive. But i refuse to play games. I am a very straight front person and sometimes i loose that. I had 7 years of mind games with someone. When we got together i did them and after a few years he did them. I learned i wont do them again. Now with Larry, if he wants to work all the time that is fine. The one thing i am not used to is he is a biker. I know from friends of mine they do alot of riding and they are different then some men. BUt i hate the idea i am already analyzing so either i need to breath and see what happens or i am not ready and sub consciously truing to sabatage things? I mean i know me and if i werent interested i would have either responded back you have the wrong idea, not interested or stop calling me. I would not have told the person to call unless i was interested in getting to know them. The night i met him there was a girl there with him. Well she came on his bike since he had helmets. She got mad and jealous about him talking to me. Now i am no homewrecker and as soon as i got there he was talking to me and so, i asked who does she belong to. None of them. So fair game, but once things with him and i led on she got upset and i backed off. But i am very blunt and clear to the point. So either he is busy due to the holidays and its his in season or he is afraid or he is a player? I wont know until he makes more moves or learns to use a phone. I dont need daily calls i have a life and that wont change. But i will not be the "man" in a relationship.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 12-19-2007 - 7:53pm

<<"not all doctors are disturbed"--->

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 10:37am

"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 10:46am

"Women make themselves a nervous wreck.

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