a noob to the North American female mind

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2004
a noob to the North American female mind
4
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 12:45am
ok ladies short and concice

i am a 22 year old guy , transfer studnet fomr pakistan , been here for over an year and have not dated since

i am on a big campus and i dont have many freinds. the ones whom i have belong to my own ethnicity so i can just specualte what females think about us or me.

normally even if i try to mingle with females (hot or not)they aviod me ..its not a problem with my personality. i am a chrming guy , talleneted one too but i guess not very well spoken and bit shy. i am good at dance floor and dress nicely too, i am but frail as compared to guys my age here ..in Nebraska actually ..but thats how we are ..bit skinny

how should i work my way around for being less social with the other half of mankind?

expectations of a 20 some thing girl ..whihc almost all of them seem to be in a relationship

i know its a stupid question

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 10:00am
You say you're charming but shy... how do you approach women? Have you thought about joining clubs on campus that suit your interest, this way you'll meet people who are on your level?

What sort of reactions are you getting? More details would be helpful...

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2004
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 3:56pm
ok frankly i have a zero social interaction with people here

i mean u can call practically zero

this is the catch

-i have almost 0 girls in my classes

- if i have some girls in classes i havent found a natural way to be around with them

like in two of my classes i barely know any one

and in other two i only know the guys who have been placed in my groups ..i dont know any one else ...whihc is way better than ;last 3 semsters where i only knew the name of my professor

during the week only thing i do is go out for classes or go out to eat in the cafetria ..on weekends i go out with one or two of my guy freinds ..play some darts have some drinks and hit the dance floor ...where people notice me : no i am not attention whore ..i really take up dancing seriously with all the break moves ...my freinds knowme for my musical dancing takenst (i am refering to 2-3 of them whom i have ..and some are leaving in a month or so)

so basically even if i try to mingle with some gal sitting on dining table ..who knows some common freind ..or in a queue ..i get negative or no reaction..always

i am not frustrated ..i assume that people dont like me cause i am hideous ..whihc is not my fault ..but then again ..more hidesou people have more freinds than i do

wats the catch. how do u girls operate.. do u always go after the tall blonde handsome guy who live in a posh flat and drives a ferrari ..or do u ever think about avergae joe at all

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 4:07pm
It's all about how you carry yourself. If you carry yourself thinking you're horrid, people pick up on that and who wants to be around that sort of attitude? If you carry yourself like you are just a cool, down-to-earth person, most folks will vibe to that...

Don't try to go up to girls with any sort of lines. Just be yourself and talk to the girls on your campus about school related things. Join some clubs, watch the guys who are successful and see what they do...

And most important, just be yourself! Don't try to impress anyone.

I hope this helps...

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 4:56pm
I had to respond to your message. I went to UNL for four years so I know exactly what enviroment you are in. The best advice I have for you is that women are attracted to confidence. I dont mean arrogance, but we love a man who is sure of himself. Also, one good way to meet girls is to sit by them in class and joke around and talk to them when you have a chance. If anything if you become friends, maybe they will have a cute friend for you :O Take advantage of environments like that where you can see someone a few times a week and really get to know them. Remember to be confident, women love the idea of exchange students :), carry yourself confidently, and you will then begin to feel that way.

Hope this helps!

Andrea