Is this normal?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2006
Is this normal?
8
Wed, 05-31-2006 - 4:20pm

I have been dating this guy for little over two months and the past couple of times we have had se, he is unable to get fully erect. He is still able to have an orgasm, but I feel as though something might be wrong since he can not get fully erect. Please let me know what you think.

Confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Wed, 05-31-2006 - 6:07pm
It's possible that he has anxiety performance, ED or else. Could be many things. If this keeps happening I'd recommened to got to a dr.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2006
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 2:40pm
What if this only happens when we are together and not when we are with other people? Could it be that maybe it is just not there for us anymore?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 8:51pm
So if this doesn't happen with other people then is he or you sleeping with other women/men? If this is the case and he's sleeping with other women I'd run the other way, as he could pass you some STD or even aids.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 9:17pm

My bf has this problem sometimes, but he's almost 40. I wouldn't blame yourself. You have to consider his age, his stress level and maybe a bad experience that causes him anxiety.

I dated a 24 year old that had imptency and had to take viagra for it.

Has he seen a doc? Maybe he should.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 9:20pm

what does he think? have you asked him?

be careful

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2006
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 8:41am
Well, he tells me its him not me, but still there is that little doubt in the back of your head wondering if it is you. The sex is great. He knows how to work it, but the last two times I was not able to have an orgasm because I was to busy worrying about him. So we just ended up stopping. Maybe it is just not there for us anymore. I mean I never had/have this problem with anybody else. He says he only had this problem with one other person but that it went away. So I really don't know what it could be. I want to tell him that maybe he needs to see a doctor, but at the same time I do not want to hurt his feelings.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2006
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 8:46am
Other people before we got together. Believe me, if he were sleeping with other people while we are together, I would leave him in a heart beat. I don't have time to play games. Thanks for your input.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 1:09pm
If he can't get a full erection during sex with you and only with you, and that this hadn't happened before when he had sex with other women, then I'd say that it's possible that he fears you getting pregnant, or that he has some issue with having sex with you. I can imagine what this like for you. However, the problem is his and not yours. He should go to a dr. to rule out any organic problem and if the issue persist then he should go to a counselor/psychologist to investigate why this is happening. You can provide support along the road as well.