not sure what to do

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
not sure what to do
3
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 9:27am
Hi,

I have been dating a guy for a little over a month. Things started off great (as they usually do), but for the past week or so, I have been unhappy. He says he is growing more interested in me, but his actions have not backed that up. So I finally asked him to go out this weekend and have a real "date" to make sure (from my perspective) that things were headed in the right direction. He said Sunday worked for him. I rearranged my schedule so that we could go out last night. When we talked at 6pm, he said he'd call me back in a few minutes. He wound up falling asleep and not calling me back for 3 hours! I was angry, frustrated, hurt, etc. I do not need to be his number 1 priority all the time, but he stood me up! I need to be his priority sometimes. He apologized, but I'm just not sure if that's enough. He knows I was angry, and says he cares, but is this just a sign of what's left to come? Should I cut my losses and get out now?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 9:53am
Well, do you buy the fact that he fell asleep? This decision is all yours, do you think he will be like this and it is just a little prevue of whats to come? Maybe what you should do is give him one more chance because you have only been dating a month. You don't even know him that well yet. If he does this one more time, i would get out. Would you agree? If you like him maybe it is worth your time to give it one more chance.

Good luck

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 10:16am
I 100% believe he fell asleep. I knew he was tired, but even so...when he knew he had plans with me, he should not have crawled into bed.

I really like him, and think we have a great potential future together. I can give him one more chance, but at the same time, I am losing confidence in him. The more he doesn't make the effort, the less I want to put effort forth. I think that's normal...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2004
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 12:58pm
Is he making it up to you for falling asleep on the date that you were supposed to go on? In my opinion, if he was really sorry and cared about your feelings, he would have said "ok I am sorry we can set up a date right now since my life is so busy".

If I was in your shoes, I would have never rearranged my schedule to see him as much as I wanted to be with him. If he really cares about you, he's the who has to rearrange his life for you. You should be treated like a queen. Never settle for less. Don't let him think he has a hold on you, because then he will do what ever he pleases with you and he will take that you can take advantage of you. No one likes to be taken advantage of so please don't give him that power to.

I do hope he makes it up to you because you deserve it. And if he doesn't, then he doesn't deserve a second chance or you.