Now this is frustrating!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2003
Now this is frustrating!!
2
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 1:47pm

I had gone out with this guy I met for 3 dates. All three of them went great, they were all initiated by him. He's funny,nice, and although I didn't feel initially attracted to him, I was interested in him, and he seemed really interested in me, the way he treated me and how he was looking at me, etc. We kissed on the second and third date, and all signs were that it was a really good start. I was getting excited, and he seemed to as well.
He told me he was going to call me on Monday, and he did. We talked for like 20 minutes, and then he asked me to his aunt's opening show at an art gallery on Thursday, but that he needed to talk to me. Basically he said that I was really attractive, he loves to spend time with me, looks forward to seeing me every time, but that he doesn't have that WOW feeling, the butterflies, and he needs to feel his gut instinct. However, he wants to keep on seeing me to see what happens.
Basically he told me he felt exactly how I was feeling- things were going slow. But for me that was good. Slowly but surely, right? And my attraction for him was growing.
So, why would he ask me on Thursday with him feeling like this? Or did he say that because it is a family thing and he doesn't want me to think too much?

Argh!! Thanks for any advice!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 2:28pm

Guys are not so complicated.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2006
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 12:28am

I don't know why he said what he said to you. I'm a little confused myself. He had to know that there was a chance that it wouldn't go over very well and maybe you would call it off. Luckily it worked out for both of you. The way in which he did that could be perceived as insensitive, upfront, blunt, brutally honest, in touch with his feelings, and/or selfish.

I don't know how many relationships the two of you have had, but it doesn't always start with a "WOW". Usually there is usually something there (either physical, emotional or intellectual) initially that does spark something inside of you to pay closer attention to him.

That instant "WOW" is the stuff of movies for most people.