Office crush

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Office crush
2
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 12:46am
I am not one for dating guys I work with but I'm going to make an exception. I met a guy who works in another department and on the other side of the building. We only see each other when I make a special point to stop by and chat cube mate who is a girlfriend of mine. He started chiming in on our conversations and I'm attracted to him. I pick up good vibes from him and he is definately interested. I haven't felt butterflies for someone is a long time and I have no idea what the rules of dating are. So this went on for several weeks and I confided in my friend who is his cube mate. She has agreed to keep it hush-hush because he is a new employee and is in his probationary period. They talk a lot and she gave me a lot of info about him. He is definately meets my criteria (i.e. no kids, works, and independent). She says that he has brought my name up in conversations and is very curious about me. So instead of carrying on with all games, I approached him. He was alone and I asked him if he would like to go out sometimes. He said yes without any hesitation. His overall body language was totally accepting. He looked directly into my eyes when we talked and agreed to keep it quiet with the exception of our mutual friend who is trust worthy. I am really nervous about anyone finding out so I make a special point to not be seen with him alone. He is really involved in a competitive sport and has events coming up which he participates in. Therefore he isn't available on the weekends for about 3 weeks. I commute an hour to work and don't normally leave until several hours after he's gone home. So with out the opportuntity to talk, I hate phones, I thought of email. I found his email address in the Yahoo directory and sent him a flirty email. Just saying hi and I hope I got the right person. When I got to work the next day he was smiley so I know he go the email. He made a quick pass by my desk and acknowledged the email. He responded and didn't mind the unsolicited email. I wrote back that email might be a good idea considering our current schedules. It seems like a good way to get to know him. I really find it difficult to interact with him w/o smiling and acting like a teen with a crush. So now what happens? We are both grown but I have a feeling that he is having the butterflies like I am (according to his cube mate). He makes a special point to pass by me occasionally and I'm doing double takes and he's doing the same. It's made work a little more interesting although I'm still considering a new job because of the commute time.

Does anyone have any advice? I've been on dates since I've been single but haven't felt this feeling towards any of them. I really think we would have fun together and feel like he's got potential. I am totally smitten with this guy and it feels great to finally meet someone I am this attracted to. Not just physically either, I am dying to get to know him.

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anonymous user
In reply to: shadeygrey
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 7:50am
My only advice is to take your time. Go slow with the flow. It's all new and exciting now. An understandable feeling. Still, take your time. Don't expect much, meaning don't build your hopes to high, yet enjoy what you're feeling now. That's all I can add.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
In reply to: shadeygrey
Tue, 04-13-2004 - 9:26am
First of all, congratulations on your newfound love interest. It is nice to feel butterflies after you are certain that your stomach can no longer have them. New crushes make you feel sexy and alive. It's a high like no other. Enjoy it.

As for any advice, I only have two thoughts. One, TAKE IT SLOW. This one's going to be trickier than usual since you may come to a point when you're spending weekends together, as well as Monday through Friday. It's a lot like having classes with a steady boyfriend in high school. Remember how much fun it was to pass notes and walk to classes together (maybe sneaking a quick kiss behind the stadium)?

Which brings me to my second piece of advice. If you teo develop a relationship, keep it quiet at work. I know it's hard to keep mum about something that makes you so happy when it's right there in front of you, but try your best. Remember that your first priority while you are there is your work and that you are always in a position to be judged on your professionalism. Romance doesn't belong in the office, period. That doesn't mean you can't tell anyone you're dating. It just means to be as discreet as possible and not let the dizziness affect your ability to focus. Plus, you can have that teenage high of passing notes again. :)

Good luck!

Ivy

georgiasugarbaby@yahoo.com