old flame pops his head back

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2004
old flame pops his head back
3
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 12:52am
recently, the guy i've been "chummy" with about a year ago has popped his head back into my life. we chat online everyday, he asks me to hang out from time to time, asks me to call him, and wants me to go see his games. i'm confused because after "hanging out" for about 5 months or so a year ago, i asked him where he saw things were going between us...he said he just wanted to have fun, but that he enjoyed my company. i felt very lead on by him, but maybe i was just naive? i have a thick guard up now...but do you blame me?!i still have some feelings for him and i am very much attracted to him physically and personality wise...but how do i know he's not going to do the same thing again? what should i do? should i "hang out" with him? it doesnt hurt right...as long as i dont get attached? any advice would be appreciated!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 8:58am
Don't kid yourself thinking you won't get attached...Nope, never gonna happen.
Lilypie Baby Days

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 9:30am
Too late! Aren't you already attached to him? You haven't said whether or not you're dating and meeting new guys...but I get the impression you've been giving this guy a lot of time you could have directed to meeting someone more available. You've made yourself so available and told him in so many ways that you're interested in him, but he's been very passive and hasn't asked you out.

You have to do what's right for you, and I don't think hanging out with this guy, hoping he'll be interested in you is the right thing. Right now he might be thinking that you like him so well that you might be up for some without the commitment.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 10:22am
I think he is being honest with you. He just likes you as a friend, a buddy. If he liked you as more than that, he would ask you on dates, instead of asking you to just 'hang out with him'. Hanging out together means "buddies" not girlfriend/boyfriend. What he may not realize, though, is its not fair to you because it gives you false hope when he spends time with you, or emails you. If it bothers you and you want more than a friendship, then don't spend too much more time with him. He cannot offer more than what he is giving you.