paranoid?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
paranoid?
3
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 1:58pm
Hello,

I started seeing a man three years ago, we fell in love and then I found out he was married. We eventually called it off and we cut all communication off. He just recently came back into my life his wife asked him to leave but now that we are together she is telling me he wants to come home and he is telling me otherwise. There is children involved and my main concern is I don't think he wants to go back but he calls her when we are apart and I wonder why most of the time he won't talk to her in front of me and when he does it's quick. Should I be worried or could it be that he feels uncomfortable? When I ask him about what she say he tells me she's lying sometimes he gets mad and says I'm not doing this everyday I did this for 5 years I'm not doing it. Any advice would be appreciated I do love him and we are happy besides this problem. Please help. Thank you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jelous1
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 2:57pm
you are off to a really, really bad start...first of all, do you know that statistically your chances of staying together is less than 20%?? You were the other woman three years ago and you are still the other woman! The man is married, married, married. He's playing on you and he's playing on her...this is an egomaniac's dream situation. Kick him out of your home. When and IF he ever gets his divorced finalized, AND he courts you and shows you the respect you deserve from your partner and woos you PROPERLY, THEN you might consider meeting him for coffee. From what you've written, it sounds like he showed up at your door because his wife kicked him out. And right she is, he's a LOSER. Don't take on her trash. She's (rightfully) angry and they have a lot of things to resolve like co parenting and custody and child support...this guy isn't ready for a relationship, just some light fun. Do you really think that his children will come to love and respect you? Even if you're not the reason why they're divorcing, the children are going to see it that way.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
In reply to: jelous1
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 7:02pm
Making the same mistake? He continues to be married. Fin someone with no baggage.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
In reply to: jelous1
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 8:33pm
You must also consider that he cheated on his wife....once a cheater always a cheater........sweetie he will cheat on you if you guys do end up together....thats something to ponder.