Please Help Me !!
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| Wed, 09-15-2004 - 2:08pm |
I have been dating a new guy for about 3 months now. He is, hands down, the best thing that has ever happened to me, for so many reasons - a truly great guy. He's about 5 years younger than me and had just turned 21 around the time we started dating. When we met, he was a virgin. We had sex very quickly once we started dating. It was not until one week afterwards that he told me that he had been a virgin. He had been in a couple previous long term relationships - his reason for waiting to have sex had been his strong religious faith. Now, three months later, he has expressed to me that he feels guilty, is very worried, and might want to stop. I absolutely respect his opinion and I would never want to lose him. I am very confused and upset by this however. Not upset as in angry way, but upset in that I feel in some way I made him do something he had no desire to do. I also am not sure how one goes backwards in a situation like this. I have been sexually active for about 5 years. This new relationship has definitely been the best sex I have had, not just physically but, more importantly, emotionally. I can't imagine just suddenly stopping, especially for what could be for years. Just wondering if anybody had any advice on how to go about doing this ... I want more than anything to be there for him and to help him through this ...

That said, you have now lost your sex partner, but have not lost your partner. You can still be intimate without having sex. Explore each other and reconnect.
If after a time, the situation isn't working for you, ie you can't live without sex, then you will have to sit down and discuss things again. If he's still not ready for sex, then you will have to make the decision to move on or accept things the way they are. If you two can't agree then you probably shouldn't continue things, but find someone who's goals and values and ideas are the same.
Good luck,
Alison
Your bf made an adult decision to have sex and now has decided to put his faith foremost and abstain from sex. You did not have anything to do with his decision rather it was him. I think you need to respect it and try and grow together emotionally as a couple and see what happens w/o sex. This is some girl's dream to have a guy be totally into you without necessarily having sex. If you just can't not have sex, then move on w/o him.
also if you have not had much luck finding a passionet & loving lover try looking in differant places like people that care about you more than sex w/ you its very hard but if you look they are out there
start a friend ship first....