Possible cheating unsure. Need input

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Possible cheating unsure. Need input
6
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 8:37am
For those who have found lipstick on their s/o/husband- What did a smudge appear like? Did it appear obvious that someone did it because it smeared all over the collar? Was it a lip type of shape? I saw a line on my boyfriend's collar but it wasn't any place else--like smeared all over the collar or in different places of the collar as well so i didn't know what to think. It wasn't red but something darker and I didn't know what to make of it. I said as we were lying down you have something on your collar and he just automatically answered its probably lipstick i guess just thinking it was from. Do i make a big ordeal of this or if he was cheating and he had something on the side--there would be more tangible clues than a line that didn't appear all over his collar. I never saw anything like that before and just wondered what others though.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 9:30am

Did you not write about this same problem a month or so ago?? If you have not found out anything else, why are you still worrying about it?

You must be driving yourself crazy if you are bringing this up yet again after so much time has passed.

xx

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 11:24am

You got a lot of people's thoughts the last time you posted this. Basically, the jist of the posts was, if he hasn't given you other reasons to not trust him and think he's cheating, then you should let it go.

I think counseling was suggested, too, for your insecurity issues...and since you're still obsessing about this weeks later, I definitely think that's a good idea.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-20-2006 - 12:11pm
Given the number of times you have posted about this issue and others, your best course of action is to break up with him immediately. You're not going to be happy until you can prove that he is wrong. Just assume that he is and make him prove that he is innocent. That way, he will dump you so fast you won't know what hit you. At least then he will be free from your abuse.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2005
Fri, 04-21-2006 - 5:26am
In the past I would have assumed something was going on.
But the past few appointments I've had shows it could be innocent.
I had an appointment and he was on the phone so I sat accoss his desk in the clients chair.
when he finished his conversation he walked over and greeted me hello with a kiss on the cheek. (As Europeans do). As I stood up my lipstick hit his collar. There was nothing going on between us at all.
On the second meeting the same thing happened. It was clumsy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 9:04am

I seriously think you should finish with this guy for his and your sanity. You are obviously determined to dwell on it even though it seems pretty innocent to me and the fact that Ive just read the same repeated message again on another website goes to show its still bothering you enormously which is not healthy. For this still to be praying on your mind in such a HUGE way shows that you are not able to get over it.

So the best thing to do is move on and then you can forget this event that seems so important to you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 10:45am

I don't think you need make a big ordeal of this but it's definitely worth a light bringing up: Uh, honey, so glad you were honest and said the stain on your shirt was lipstick but it wasn't mine.

,