Question

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Question
7
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 11:15am
I have a question for those single women out and about playing the dating game. Of course men are welcomed to answer too.


When you are dating someone do you spend a lot of time on the phone with the individual or do you only talk to that person when only when you have plans to make? Also, does this determine the qaulity of the realtionship for you?

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 1:33pm
I'm not much of a phone person so typically I will only talk to someone I'm seeing every other day or so, and for a short time (5-10 minutes). To me, the phone is primarily just a way of touching base and catching up and for making or confirming plans.

I may be getting involved in a LDR though...if so I will have to change my habits/views on phone calls!!!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 2:19pm
I am a phone person, so I prefer to talk on the phone to someone I'm dating every day (not all the time, but once a day for 5-15 minutes is good). With my schedule, I'm only able to go out on 1 date (2 at most) in a week's time. If I didn't talk on the phone, I'd never know what was going on in anyone else's life on a daily basis.

I think the frequency of phone calls does affect the level of commitment to a certain degree when you don't get a lot of face time with someone. Simply because if you talk to someone more, you know what's going on with them each day and in the beginning, that's a sort of bonding that is hard to duplicate by spending a few hours a week together. At the same time, I've known women who flipped out if a guy didn't call one day. That's a little extreme I think.

More important than how often you talk on the phone is knowing that you two are comfortable enough to call whenever.

Ivy

georgiasugarbaby@yahoo.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 2:35pm
I think this is a very individual thing. Personally I don't like talking on the phone, and luckily my SO doesn't either. Our phone conversations are very brief. Our dislike of phone conversations has no bearing on the quality of our relationship, which is wonderful. We're very close. We're best friends, passionate lovers and partners in every way.

Other people feel differently. The woman who sits next to me at work talks to her husband about 10 times a day and says "I love you" in every conversation. That's fine if it suits both people. Everyone's different. And of course, the key to a happy and satisfying relationship -- finding someone who's on the same page (about many, many things).

Hope this helps.

Avatar for bratgirl2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 2:43pm
I may be getting involved in a LDR though...if so I will have to change my habits/views on phone calls!!!

You ain't just whistlin' Dixie...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2004
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 2:46pm
I'm a phone person. I love to talk on the phone. My only real boyfriend (so far) was my ex-husband and I hardly ever talked to him on the phone when we were dating. I couldn't stand it because his nutty family was always screaming and yelling in the backround. And then his nosy mother and sister would pick the extension up and listen in. But I remember that I really wanted to talk to him frequently. Not necessarily every night, but maybe every other night. I think it's important to keep the communication flowing.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 2:50pm
I just sent him an email about cell phone plans...because it's obvious that the one I have isn't going to work (I'm already over my "anytime" minutes for this billing cycle and I love talking to the guy, but not at 40 cents a minute!!!!).

I can't believe I'm getting myself into this...

Sheri

Avatar for bratgirl2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
In reply to: sunshnhappy111
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 3:00pm
My home phone plan is Verizon Freedom...unlimited long distance...yum. Unfortunately, my man usually calls ME....I should probably ask him what his phone bill is running these days....I kid you not, we talk...um...ALOT!