Ready to commit or call it quits????
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| Thu, 08-09-2007 - 1:33pm |
Background: I've been dating a great guy for a little over 3 years. We started out a bit rocky but we've both grown very close over the past few years and have fallen deeply in love. He's a wonderful guy (chivalrous, kind, supportive, great sex, dedicated, successful...and on and on). We've recently started talking about getting married and he wants to spring the big question soon.
Call it Quits?
In all honesty getting married at my age (22) and starting a family was definitely not in my life plans. The big part is the kids. I want to wait until my early 30's so my career is more established, travel volunteer work is complete (I am passionate about aiding in the recovery of disaster struck nations), and I feel a bit more 'ready'. My BF is already 31 and ready to at least start trying to have kids shortly after we're married. Although he supports the work I do (career and volunteer) he wants me to take fewer and less trips and think about joining our companies together. I currently work part time supporting his company, but I feel I don't have time to do more without compromising my own career. We don't share a lot of interests and we live very seperate lives in many ways. This said, somehow it just works. The problem is that we have different ideas of the future and we're both pretty stubborn about what we want in life.
Ready to Commit?
If I am going to get married and start a family he's the perfect man to do it with. I love him and I don't want to lose what we have.
As I'm writing this I think I already know the answer to my own questions, but what if I'm making the wrong choice? I don't want to call it quits and then 5 years down the road wish that I could take it back. To this point in my life I have no regrets. I would like to keep it that way. Is it silly to give up the perfect man so I can follow my passions? The trouble is that I don't want to follow my passions alone, but in order to not be alone I feel like I have to give up part of my passions. To follow my passions I end up alone.
HELP!

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Timing is an important element in relationships, again you're quite young with a lot of life left to live so don't make decisions based on fear of the future but anticipation of who you can become.
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