right guy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
right guy?
1
Fri, 01-20-2006 - 7:50pm
So im sure just about everyone has heard "maybe your just going after the wrong guys/girls" Can annnyyone tell me who the RIGHT guy is?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-1999
Fri, 01-20-2006 - 8:24pm

The relationship expert, Barbara DeAngelis has a list of six character traits which you should look for in a man and cultivate in yourself which I agree. The right guy will be somebody who has all of these characters traits. These are the sort of things you should be keeping your eyes open for and eveluating when you're getting to know a guy.

1. Commitment to growing and improving. "Commitment to growth means he wants to learn anything he can about being a better person. You don't have to threaten him to grow. He's doing it on his own."

2. Emotional openness. "He'll be a man in touch with his feelings who chooses to express those feelings to you. You'll feel that the door to his heart is open and not closed."

3. Integrity. "Look for signs that he is honest with himself, with you, and with others. You want to respect the way he treats people professionally and personally."

4. Maturity and responsibility. "Good character means a man has a grown up and doesn't act like a child, expecting you to take care of him. He does what he says he is going to do. He keeps his promises, shows up on time, and respects his word."

5. High self-esteem. "Good character means a man feels good about who he is and how he's living his life, rather than walking around apoligizing for himself. He takes good care of himself, his body, his environment. He doesn't allow others to mistreat him."

6. Positive attitude towards life. "Make sure your man isn't a negative person always focusing on problems, finding something to complain about, with a cynical attitude. A man with good character sees the goodness in the world, in you and in himself, and you end up feeling good about life when you're with him."

She has a whole book about how to find the right guy that you might want to check out. It's called "The Real Rules: How to Find the RIGHT Man for the REAL You." If you've heard about the book "The Rules" which tells women how to play hard to get, don't worry, that's a different book by different authors. This book was written after the other one came out as an alternative for women who were looking to find a healthy relationship rather than one that was based on game playing.