Romantic woman are hard to find...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2007
Romantic woman are hard to find...
9
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 8:25am

Dear D,

My wife passed almost 2 years ago, and recently I have been on Match.com(RightHereMyDear), to find a potential mate. The woman I have met there have all been nice, but we just didn't click, so I figured I would send you my profile intro, and maybe you can help me find her...

I was married to one woman for 20 years, so commitment in a relationship has never been an issue with me. I have always been a responsible dad and a loyal husband.

My personality is, well, let's put it this way...I get invited to a lot of parties and football games because I get everybody laughing. I'm even the life of the party, when my daughter has a party with a bunch of her 21 year old friends.

I am a great date. Always a gentleman, engaging and funny, but I do tire of dating. I can tell you that if we had a relationship together, you would find that you could totally be yourself.

Things that make a good life, like always keeping our sense of humor, being best friends, mutual trust, sharing our hopes, our dreams, our fears, our weaknesses, our strengths...the wonder of being so close to another human being, and having the feeling that we have found our place in the world...how hard can that be, for any of us to take? I long for the wonder of YOU.

I would like my life to start a new journey now, different, adventurous, playful. I carry no baggage, and don't dwell on the past and look at life as new and exciting.

I am very down to earth, and am told my laugh is contagious. I would like to meet a woman who is affectionate, the more touchy-feely, the better. I am big on kissing, you know, the way you did in high school, where you just can't stop for days, and that's all you want to do.

I will never clip your wings, and will always encourage you to fly higher. There is nothing that fills my heart more than to see your smile. You will receive everything I have to offer, without games or hesitation. It's always real with me.

I can speak in front of a room of Fortune 500 executives and command their attention, and I can shoot darts with the locals at the pub down the street. My ocean is vast and deep. I can turn on a dime, from intellectual, to a scene from 9 1/2 weeks, we could then be off to a fundraiser, then finding a private spot at 3am.

I know I am different. When I fall in love, I fall deeply in love, but always leave space for that person to love me back, and if it's not both ways, I am on my way back to the things in my life that keep me centered.

Your outer shell has become thicker, but only to protect a heart that has become more tender. You sometimes wear a mask, and take chances with men you already know aren't right, to bury the thought of never finding the one that is.

When our oceans connect, we will swim and play and laugh and love, creating a level of life that is above what we could ever create individually. Come to me, my love, stay in my arms forever, give me your heart. I will always treasure you. All My Love, All My Life, Ron

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 8:58am

Hi Ron and welcome to the board.


I would suggest posting this on our Online Dating board as there's many experienced people there who can help to critique your profile. You can get there by clicking on the link in my signature.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 10:30am

My critique:

(and to clarify, yes, I am fairly unromantic - I admit to it...)

This profile would turn me off. For one thing it's too long - I like a little detail but I also appreciate brevity. And (towards the end) it's too mushy. I'm not completely against a *little* romance, but too much too soon is (for me anyway), well... it doesn't feel right.

However, this is just one woman's opinion, so take it with a grain of salt. Best of luck to you, always.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-1999
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 11:06am

I would agree that your profile is too wordy, I found myself skimming over the 'fluffier' parts - it seemed...well, like I was reading a Harlequin Romance novel! I'm that way with any long and wordy profiles - my thought is either this guy likes to hear himself talk or he's trying very hard to be liked. Either way, its a bit of a turn off.

I personally like someone who is direct and straight to the point and doesn't need to sell himself so hard. My experience is that the harder someone tries to sell themselves the more I need to stay away. Its a bit heavy on the 'romance' part but not the real day to day, mundane part - romance is great, but it's not the substance of a person or a relationship.

I think your romantic side could come across in it without all the fluff and filler. I'd recommend cutting it by half - save some of this stuff for the first date! Show her, don't tell her - that's the fun part.

anyhoo, that's one woman's opinion. Good luck in your search.

Toni

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2005
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 2:10pm

<

I like hanging with my friends at parties and football games and like to get everybody laughing, even my daughter's 21 year old friends.

There are other times I like to just relax and listen to a little music or hang out at the beach and watch the sunset

I hope to someday make that connection that will change my life. Sense of humor and mutual trust are a must.>>

Leave the rest for your first few emails. Too much info leaves nothing to wonder.
I'd trim the details on the left a bit as well. Just like a relationship, too much too soon is not a good thing! There are plenty of romantic women out there, but the way your profile is now might just scare them off. Good Luck!

PATTY

~Dare to believe in yourself~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2007
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 3:07pm
Good Luck on finding the love of your life I used to go on Match.com too and Yahoo I even tried Perfect Match and E Harmony all failed but its OK it turns out the love of my life was right in front of me the whole time now we are finally together it will happen one day for you too HUGS

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2007
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 4:41pm

Thank you for your candid opinion, it's much appreaciated.

Ron

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2007
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 4:46pm

Thank you for responding. Everybody is in a different place when it comes to this dating thing, I know I can get wordy, and i will take your advice.

Thanks, Ron

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2007
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 4:49pm

I was married for 20 years, but my wife passed away last year, so, I guess in due time, things will come back together.

Thank you,
Ron

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Sat, 03-03-2007 - 4:59pm

hi Ron...things i liked about your profile:

>>"I was married to one woman for 20 years, so commitment in a relationship has never been an issue with me. I have always been a responsible dad and a loyal husband...I would like my life to start a new journey now, different, adventurous, playful. I carry no baggage, and don't dwell on the past and look at life as new and exciting....I am very down to earth, and am told my laugh is contagious. I would like to meet a woman who is affectionate.">>

things i didn't like quite soo much ;)

>>"I know I am different. When I fall in love, I fall deeply in love"">

whats soo "different" about that?...sounds a bit pretentious to me...most all hope to fall in love deeply in my opinion, experience, and observation...

sooo, umm, i thought it a bit long, i found myself scrolling down to be done with it...of course we need to convey we're attractive, engaging, great people, but i found it a bit much of tooting your own horn...i'm one for having a man leave me a subtle reason to gain my attention and to stumble on a humble, modest man being a prince :)...and why all the love stuff at the end?...left me wonderin why its soo easy for you to speak that way to masses of females on a dating site, gave me the feeling you were trying to lead a woman on and/or too premature/rash in love.

JMHO

you sound like a nice man, i'd suggest you tone down this profile and leave a bit to imagination, so a woman can be pleasantly surprised to be on dates with you and discover what a wonderful guy you are....have it titilating enough to catch some attention, but not so long and detailed as to then lose it ;)

good luck to you Ron.

honey

ps, i'm widowed too, lost my 42 y/o husband 5 years ago....i understand having the rug pulled out from under you at this age...best to you and your children.