Roomate in love!!!! What to do?? do tell

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Roomate in love!!!! What to do?? do tell
7
Tue, 11-01-2005 - 12:03pm
Hi everyone! I need all the help anyone could need, haha. The situation is this, i live in a house with 6 other roomates, one I´m specially connected with. The thing is, this weekend as many others we went out to his sister´s we stayed there and we went out to a bar, we´ve been drinking all day and by night we were a little more happy than usual. The thing is, that we began dancing and then he kissed me and told me he loved me!!!!!!
I was stunned! But, also kissed back. We had such a wonderful time and the next morning, we were like if nothing would have ever hapened!! I remembered everything but he didnt so, because we were in company i didnt brought it up, until we were alone again comming back home. I asked him if he didnt remember anything? And he said that little bits and that it was confusing, the thing is I remembered him and kiss him, and so we made out again and told him that i wouldnt do this again, that if he didnt remember I would never say a thing.
What happened on monday night is that he did remember!!! And we realized that we had a lot of fun and that we care about each other, but, he said, that we should wait and see what happens.
What does that mean? That nothing´s going to happen? That later will happen? That we´ll be like that forever? Should I speak to him or could he feel pressured? AHhhhhhhhh I think i´ll talk to him because I cant be in the limboo, but, is it too much? Is he only afraid or only not interested????
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2005
Tue, 11-01-2005 - 9:15pm

I've decided to post a reply because I'm in a very similar situation to yours.

I live with 4 other people and have been especially close to one of them during the last 6 months. He moved in 6 months ago and since then we've been flirting with eachother. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but always - yes. For a while he had a girlfriend, but even then the flirting was on. We kissed a couple of times in similar situations - he was drunk. In the morning he would apologise but always let me know how he doesn't regret kissing me. My reaction was always to say 'it's cool... don't worry about it... we had fun and that was it'.

And then last week we ended up having s*x with eachother. I always knew it would happen. The tension was becoming absolutely incredible. I even rejected him a couple of times but in the end caved in. Now we are behaving like a couple. He'll move out in a month and I don't know what will happen. But none of our other roommates know. We are not a boyfriend and a girlfriend. I don't know what we are.

I guess we're taking it slowly and will see where it goes. May go nowhere, but may also turn into a relationship. Who knows.

So don't stress out. It's a bit more complex when you get involved with a roommate and you should be extra careful as it is easier to get hurt.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 8:23am
Schnittke, thank you so much for your sight! It´s comforting to read your post. And since my last post, everything is going smooth, besides the awkwardness of the first moment, but, we´re trying to get things back on track, mostly because we like to spend time together and would be a shame if not to. So, following advise, I´m cool and not stressing about, so Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 1:11pm

I'm sure he's got a good bit of fear. the two of you are roommmates, it's a very touchy situation (forgive pun). I seriously doubt he forgot what happened!


,
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 1:53pm

That pun was the best! hahaha.

Thank you for posting your thoughts! We´ve already had the ackward talk, but everything is evolving just right. I don´t know, in the moment I felt so anxious and confused, but now I´m in an optimistic mood and only trying to get everything to how it was like before. Maybe it will never be the same, but, could be better or at least we could remain friends.

:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Sat, 11-05-2005 - 2:42pm

He was interested when you were drunk and he was horny, but in the light of day he was "forgetful".

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 11-07-2005 - 6:10pm
Yep, that´s exactly what´s going on. We´re behaving as usual, as roomates and of course it feels weard and that´s why I got to the same reasonning as you did, so, right now I´m trying to have a more independent life, it´s hard, because we were also friends and have friends in common. I ain´t saying I´ll stop talking to him, but I want to spend less time with him, so we both can move on with our lifes, well, at least with mine.
Thank you Alison:)
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Mon, 11-07-2005 - 11:22pm

Good, it's best to just forget it happened.

Photobucket