Rules on waiting/not waiting to be intim

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2006
Rules on waiting/not waiting to be intim
3
Tue, 11-14-2006 - 5:46pm

My emotions and

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-14-2006 - 5:57pm

Huh, interesting. To me, sleeping with someone on the 4th date would be a clear case of NOT waiting, LOL!!!! Just goes to show, everyone's different.

Unless I'm just looking for a casual fling (which I can't handle anyway so I'm not), having sex that soon would be a recipe for disaster because I'd get attached and wouldn't be able to objectively get to know the person over time. 4 dates barely scratches the surface of getting to know someone, IMO. For me, "waiting" means dating regularly for at least 6-8 weeks, dating 1-3 times a week.

So, it's up to you. If you can handle casual sex and you don't get attached and you're ok with taking the risk that he'll disappear after you've had sex with him (or doesn't want a relationship or doesn't want to be exclusive or any of the dozens of things that you can't find out when you don't know someone well), then go for it. OTOH, if you tend to get attached through sex, then it's probably a good idea to wait and get to know him better.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2006
Tue, 11-14-2006 - 7:11pm

Yes I believe you are right.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Tue, 11-14-2006 - 9:11pm
If you were sure, you wouldn't be asking... may I suggest working out or even going for a run? When I go running, all that pent up energy seems to subside. Not that it goes away completely, hence the reason for running every day. LOL