Is second chance a possibility

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
Is second chance a possibility
5
Sat, 03-13-2004 - 8:01pm
I met a guy way over a year, we got physical quite quickly, anyways there were lots of things involved including, we were both busy, we were not ready for a relationship, time constraints amongst other things. I caught him looking online personals. He said, since he was new to the area he was looking to meet people. Besides, we weren't a couple, so I don't think I had the right to accuse of anything. However, I have issues about control and being dominant. I have been working on it. Anyways, I guess he realized I was too much to handle and stopped talking to me. I have dated other people since then. I dated someone else for a brief moment. Several months lets say.

However, I would like to see the first person again. I Haven't seen him over a year. His 30th birthday is coming up in a matter of weeks. I was thinking perhaps, I should call him to wish him a happy birthday and break the ice and take it from there. See if we have a second shot at it or even become friends for now. I genuinly like him as a person and I think he is a nice guy. I screwed it up by trying to rush things and take control of the situation. I have since learned a lesson.

Should I call him for his birthday?

Do you think its a good idea?

Do we have a shot second time around or am I wasting my time and breath?

Has anyone been in such a situation.

Please help me clarify the situation. Its driving me nuts!!

Thanks in advance!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sun, 03-14-2004 - 9:30am
It can't hurt to give it a shot. If you like him and think you are compatible, call him and see if he is still unattached.

I am in the process of reading a book you might find interesting. It's tough to read, I read a few pages and think about it and come back to it later.... but not that thick of a book and has some great insights on women who are either overly passive or overly controlling in relationships, and in life in general. It's "The Wounded Woman" by Linda Schierse Leonard if you are interested, check it out.

Good luck.

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Avatar for happychick01
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-14-2004 - 12:34pm












I hope he is single and if he is then sure why not go for it I think u can call him up and say Happy B-day to him and then go from there see how his life has been and go from there - I have been in this situation once but the guy was married LOL thats ok we are still friends today 5 yrs later and now Im married also :)


Good Luck !!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Sun, 03-14-2004 - 4:06pm

So, I'm sitting here reading and wondering where my reply went! Then I realzied that I answered your post on another board...


I'll be ok one of these days... I do hope that we have been helpful both here and on GT as well... let us know how this turns out!


tg

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 6:17pm
It's over honey! Savor the moments and move on. Trust me, if he was truly interested in keeping up communications with you, he would of. Don't bother sending a bday card. Just let it go. Learn from this experience and take it slow the next time. Enjoy your life, it's all you have!

Take care!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 8:03pm
Thanks!!

:-)