shy girl needs help getting her man

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2004
shy girl needs help getting her man
3
Wed, 08-04-2004 - 11:11pm
I need to figure out how to get the guy I like. We work together but its not often lately. I think he might like me. we seem to flirt. some examples..

My first real encounter with him that might have been flirting... we were at an afterbar.. He had some wierd fan type gadget and kept sticking it by my head..I was layin on a couch.. kept hittin at him to quit.. finally said f--- u... he said maybe later.. I stupidly said he wasnt my type...

I also found a personal ad for him.. and questioned him on it..givin him crap.. he said it was a joke his friends played.. I of course didnt buy it etc.

I invited him out for my bday.. he said he had to work at the bar.. but that I should come there... I did for one.. when i got there he acted like.. "oh man,you".. kinda thing.. then smiled, wished me happy bday etc.

At work one day he had a floor cleaner machine.. pretended to try to run me over.. was like.. "damn it i missed".. I turned and raised my fist at him.. he just smiled at me...

One Sun I went to a bar.(he works there). to meet a diff guy..(but i didnt really like him much) anyway.. I got there first.. talked to the one I like..told him the situation.. later us 3 played darts. I guess him and I were flirting..cuz the guy I was meetin decided to leave... i stayed..we played another game and chatted for a while.

I went to the bar he works at 2 thursdays in a row but it was busy.. I talked to him only while giving him a joke to figure out.

Anyway.. does he seem interested?? Some say yes, but then others say if he was he would have asked me by now? How can I get him to ask me out since I am so shy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 10:25am
It seems to me that he just invites you to come to the bar where he works. This is easy for him; doesn't take much work on his part. What I feel is, he isn't making much of an effort. If he is interested, he WOULD make the effort. Also, just an FYI, a lot of guys aren't really attracted to women who cuss and use swear words. They tend to see these women as "one of the guys", you know?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 10:43am
He certainly does pay attention to you, he has seen you with other guys and even though you didn't mean it, you once said he wasn't your type.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2004
Thu, 08-05-2004 - 10:54am
Ok, first of all, swearing once is NOT going to turn him off that much, if he liked you. I could see if you were talking like a trucker and spitting, but thats not what you do, right?

I do think you are putting in too much of an effort though. As much as you like this guy, stop going to his work. At work, treat him like you always do, be nice and friendly, but dont chase him. I know there arent that many old fashioned people in the world anymore, but this isnt really about that. If you liked a guy, and as you were getting to know him, he made it all to easy for you, you wouldnt be as interested right? My suggestion is be around him, but be too busy with your fabulous life to go hang out at his bar (unless you really like the scene, but there are plenty of good bars out there). If he does like you, or begins to in the future, he will make the time for YOU.