Single for the rest of my life(I'm 18)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2004
Single for the rest of my life(I'm 18)
2
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 12:43am
Hi my name is Brandii and I am currently a freshmen in a big university. I am 5 foot 2 and not totally hot, but okay looking. I have never been kissed (next month I turn 19), and only had a boyfriend once, he had a nasty temper so it didn't end well. I always seem to pick the losers. Anyways, I think I have a fear of abandonment and I think its why I won't allow myself to open up to any man. Please give me advice. Thanks.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 6:51am
Hon, you attract men based on how you feel about yourself. If you have a low self esteem you probably "look" for men who are lossers and pass on men who you think wouldn't want to date you. The first thing to do is to look inside of you and search why you feel worthless of a good man and why you pick men who aren't good for you. Once you've figured this out you can change that thinking and rise your self worth. After that you set boundaries for you and every person who gets in contcat with you. These boundaries should be enforced for them to be effective. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-09-2004 - 11:56am
brandii2003...

Pianoguy thinks you should FORGET about being married (or even acquiring a steady b/f) and ENJOY COLLEGE! The 4 years or more can be AN ABSOLUTE BLAST! And you know something, you'll meet such a diverse group of men (who have various interests and come from various backgrounds) that you'll get a "BETTER IDEA" of what REALLY want when it's time to choose a husband. (And Pianoguy is convinced that it's the woman who REALLY does the choosing, not the man)! It's amazing how easy it is for some of us to 'gravitate' toward a woman who ISN'T "Totally Hot!"

Please don't judge all of us based on the lousy temper of a past b/f. Many of us are actually very cuddly...and sweet!

Pianoguy