tempted by an ex

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-04-2006
tempted by an ex
2
Tue, 07-04-2006 - 1:27am

Help.. I am driving myself crazy!

I am currently in a long distance relationship with a boyfriend of 2 years. He is a very sweet and caring guy and I believe he loves very much. Unfortunately, I only see him about once a month and I get very lonely sometimes.

For the past few weeks, I keep running into an ex boyfriend of mine. This ex and I had a very close, passionate relationship that ended badly. However, seeing him recently has churned up a lot of feelings. I am very drawn to him and sometimes tempted to be with him again.

I find myself pushing away my current boyfriend and wondering if I still love him as much as I should. I am confused and feeling incredibly guilty.
Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-04-2006 - 7:32am

deerpark99...

PG thinks there are lots of lonely people who will "accept a substitute" instead of waiting for the person who can truly make them happy?

Many ivillagers (including yours truly) have indicated how difficult it is to sustain a "long distance" relationship....which is the reason why many of these relationship eventually DISSOLVE!

So you need to ask yourself if the current b/f is worth holding on to? And if the 2 of you will eventually "get closer" (quoting the old Seals & Crofts pop hit from the 70s)!
If your answer is YES...then focus on the b/f and put thoughts about the previous b/f out of your head! If your answer is NO...then ask yourself if you'd be happier with another man who happens to lives closer to you?

This DOESN'T mean the EX will make a suitable replacement!

Not being a believer in going backwards (a.k.a. renewing an acquaintance with an EX wife or g/f), I can't tell you if "reuniting" with your EX-BOYFRIEND is the right choice or not? But you might want to ask yourself...and perhaps write down a few of the reasons JUST WHY THE EX BECAME YOUR EX?

Sometimes seeing those thoughts on a legal pad can help to make your choice easier?

Good Luck!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Fri, 07-07-2006 - 5:04pm

A long distance relationship is very hard. Is there an end date in sight or is this continuing indefinitely. This might be something you want to rethink. Are you making longterm plans?


,