Three Weeks and I am Done

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2006
Three Weeks and I am Done
1
Tue, 04-04-2006 - 10:06pm
I am not sure why I do this, but I never seems to make it past three weeks with any man that I date. I am a 24 year old attractive, educated, successful woman, but for some reason or other, I can not hold on to any man. I want to be in a relationship, and I meet wonderful men (well, usually they are wonderful) that simply do not hold my attention. Typically, I am crazy about the the first week, neutral the second, and can not stand them the third. By the fourth week, I am already dating someone new. Often, I leave these men confussed and heart broken, as they tend to fall for me all too quickly. I never have a problem finding someone to date, I just can not seem to retain anyone. Any suggestions?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 7:04am

Well I just want to say I was exactly like you. I spent my 20s having 2-3 week relationships with me usually ending it as after a couple of weeks, doubts started to set in. All completely unfounded and usually with me worrying what others thought about him and how I may miss out on something by being in a relationship. I then managed to date a guy for about 2-3 months in my late 20s but that ended as he treated me bad and I knew I had to make a break. At aged 30, I resigned myself to the fact that I was just one of those people not capable of being in a long term relationship.

Then aged 31, I met a guy I used to fancy when I was 18. We hit it off and started out very casually, him because he had split from his wife due to her cheating on him and me because I was aware of my track record. We kept it fun, kept saying we were casual so no pressure was on us and we were basically good griends who had sex. Anyway as time went on, our feelings grew and we bcame boyfriend and girlfriend. 9 months down the line, I still love being with him. He means the world to me and im glad to have him in my life.

I really hate to use the saying "your time will come" as that used to wind me up when all my coupled up friends would say that to me. But it is true. The year before I met him, I just thought sod it and asked a few guys out I fancied. OK they all said no but it sort of made me feel enpowered. Even though they had said no, I was still ok and still able to go out and have fun. And it was during one of these fun nights out I met my current boyfriend.

Just keep getting out there, chatting to guys and having a laugh. Dont view any of them as a potential partner and you may find that one just happens to fall into that slot. If you like one of them, see him once a week or every couple of weeks. Keep the contact quite basic and to a minimum and keep up all your other activities. This will stop you from getting bored. And when the right one comes along, you wont have this problem, you will want to spend time with them. An old cliche, but true.

Good luck
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