Timeframe for a relationship after divor
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Timeframe for a relationship after divor
| Tue, 03-09-2004 - 9:43am |
Got a question for anyone who can answer!! I am currently in the process of divorcing my second husband. I have been living on my own for about two months. During this time, I have begun to see someone. I know he has feelings for me and I am starting to have feelings for him. My question to anyone is this:
is there a proper timeframe to express your feelings to someone while you are going through a divorce? I realize Love has no timeframe, but in this case, isn't there a standard?
Thanks for any comments!

Some people on this board will say be divorced for a year before embarking on a new relationship. I think that is good advice, but may not be necessary in every case. One person might be ready soon after a divorce, another person may not be anywhere near ready even 2 years after a divorce.
The advice I give myself is to take it slow. I'm seeing someone now and I am being cautious, making sure the "getting to know you" phase is overly long and the "i love yous" don't start until we are really ready to go to the next level. The difficulty is that it is hard to go to the next level when you aren't legally single yet.
There is no need to rush this relationship. Just because you are starting to care for this person doesn't mean you need to follow a time table. Enjoy his company but focus on doing what you need to to be come a happy, healthy, independent individual too.
Edited 3/9/2004 1:21 pm ET ET by firstamendment
As far as the guy I'm seeing now, I have to admit, he is my first husband. We've both grown as far as maturity and other aspects are concerned. I AM taking it slow, but I know what his intentions are. I basically told him that we'd see where it goes and take it from there. I'm 35 and he's 40.
I was just curious as to the proper etiquette, so to speak, on these types of things.
Thanks for your help!
Cheers.
I am sure your never say never approach works fine for you - my approach - recognizing boundaries that I would never cross - works just as well for me.