tired of being single....
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tired of being single....
| Mon, 10-04-2004 - 5:16pm |
and i apparently keep looking for 'love' in the 'wrong places'
any suggestions as to where to meet guys?
| Mon, 10-04-2004 - 5:16pm |
any suggestions as to where to meet guys?
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i'm still reading everyone's posts and just kinda absorbing it all
hey there!
look i know exactly what you mean, after breaking up with my college sweetheart who i was sure was the "one" i was single almost 6 years and meeting guys wasn't a prob when in college but it got harder and harder as i transitioned away from school and into the "real world" in a nut shell i decided to give online a try because the guys i did meet in the grocery store or at bars weren't the type of guys that i wanted to settle down with, they were just not compatabile!
I finally gave online a shot and decided to start meeting people and of course i met my fair share of nice guys i never saw,jerks intrested in sex, and of course my favorites good old fashion weirdos*LOL* I ended up trying Eharmony and i have to say that site ROCKS!! sure it was a bit higher but the diffrence was i was being matched up with guys by someone in utah based of the criteria i selected and honest questions i answered about my self and things i desired in a mate! now i will admit i did find a few of the "selections" unattractive, weirdos,sex starved or old, etc...but i just kept sending the confidiental emails to the guys that i was intrested in and whala in one months time the very last guy who coressponded with me is now my current boyfriend of over 6 months and we are so well matched its hilarious we have TONS in common! We basically agreed after the 5th date that we would tell people we met at a local star bucks because truthfully i did meet him that way and its noone elses bussiness.....hope i was some help!
i'm just kinda taking things one day at a time. it's hard to be 'talking' to someone who you know you want something more with but trying not to portray your desire for a bf. or know if hes even interested in you that way too.. i'm ready to throw my hands up in all of this!
Hi Hockeybabe,
In regard to your last comment: the
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that did help. however i read the last few posts about numbers decreasing after college. i'm almost done school and i haven't really dated anyone for a significant period of time yet - nor have i come across anyone i would consider dating. (since i've moved here for school) so if it doesnt get any better from here on out..i'm at a loss i assume.
when i'm out in bars/clubs/out w/ friends guys hit on me all the time (even in the library over the weekend) but they're not hot...i'm not attracted to them. well i shouldnt say 'all the time' a fair amount, and sometimes we'll exchange numbers but loose touch or i'll just not be interested or not feel anything between us.
i know that the guy will fall in your lap when you least expect it i've been told that time after time after time, but i feel now i am really ready for a rel'ship and i cant keep lying to myself saying i dont want one, or i'm happy being single. cause that's not the case.
So, i really didn't want just a boyfriend i wanted someone i could have my happily ever after with and that was not going to happen over night....
Soon, my desire for a boyfriend diminished and i figured out all i "really" wanted was to date!! someone to pick me up at my door , to have great phone conversations with, bring me little gifts, to laugh with me, to go to movies and events with, to have a nice dinner with and to ask how my day was! You can get all of that in a date! once i realized this i dated "Everyone" and expanded my horizions to online sites to increase my date potiental!!
The perk to online was instead of having one or 2 dates every other week as i met people on the day to day was i ended up with a "Rotation"!!! I would chat up as many guys as i could on my work email (didn't give out personal info)and then on my work phone (has unavail i.D.) and when i thought i found a potiental date they would earn the cell #( easier to change the number in case dude's psycho) and eventually i ended up meeting in the afternoon in a highly populated area in public ( this is for the first 3-4 dates) i would end up with 3-4 dates a week! i loved it i felt like the ultimate "IT" girl*LOL* when i ended up with my BF i was happy but hell i kinda miss all that dating 3-4 guys a week and cell phone ringing nonstop from 5-11 p.m hehehe :)
This way if it didn't work out at least i got some free quality time with no strings attached!90% of dates SUCK and are not going to yeild someone boyfriend/relationship worthy, but in the mean time you can still get some of the perks!!! if i were you hockey babe i would try more dating! Even if online doesn't intrest you, try dating those guys who ask you out! As long as you feel safe date them! Besides some times those not so hot guys are the ones who want to be and are the best boyfriends and husbands!
However, I have to say that it's time to get past not dating a man because he's not "hot." I've known several great guys that I did not initially think were attractive but after I got to know them, I was really attracted to them because of how they conducted their lives and treated me. They actually became better looking in my eyes. Try tossing your list of requirements out the window (it's obviously not working for you) and just open yourself to making new friends.
I would much rather say I met someone online than in a bar. This is just one of those ridiculous social standards that will change with time but only if people start being honest about it. If anybody gives you any garbage about it just say that you had to try something new because you weren't having any luck meeting new people any other way.
Good luck!
hi there,
Been single myself for a while. Best thing you can do is join a dating site!
I joined planet personals about three months ago and my confidence has soared. I am not saying you will meet Mr right, but you will get an awful lot of much need compliments from some really nice guys. You may even meet mr right now!
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