Too busy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2004
Too busy?
4
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 1:53pm

I am in a long-distance relationship, and he is trying to arrange to move back shortly. However, in the meantime, his phone calls have dropped to practically nothing. Everything is fine when we talk...he says he loves me, misses me, can't wait to come home.

Should I chalk it up to his stress of finding a new job, leaving his old one, packing working etc and be patient until he returns, or is this likely a sign that he is losing interest? Bottom line; is there such a thing as "too busy" or am I just making excuses for him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
In reply to: squeevil
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 3:17pm
How long have you been involved, how long have you been separated, how long til he does move back - you said "shortly."

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-1999
In reply to: squeevil
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 3:25pm
I don't think that just because he rarely calls, it necessarily means he's not interested. My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for several years now (it's my fault we haven't been able to move closer sooner) and since he has never liked the phone, he has always been an infrequent caller. But he has still waited all of this time for me to do what I need to do so we can live together, and he says he wants to marry me. Plus, everything else he has always said and done seems to suggest that he really loves and cares about me a lot. I also think it is normal when you have been dating for a while to go through periods of time when you feel like talking to your partner less than you do at other times. If everything else seems to be fine in your relationship, I don't think you need to worry.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2004
In reply to: squeevil
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 3:33pm

Thanks for getting back to me.

Our history, as brief as I can make it is: we met online last October, talked for awhile, met in December. He lost his job in January and the only one he could find was out of the country. After only a few dates, I didn't think it was fair to ask him to pass it up.

He left in early March. He wanted to stay exclusive, we both said we loved each other, he's been back to visit twice...we've managed to work through most everything thus far. He plans to move back in a few weeks; probably another month, maybe 2 at most.

I really truly think he is "the one" but this one stumbling block keeps making me question how much of a priority I am for him. I want to be fair, give him space and be supportive, but I also don't want to make excuses for him...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
In reply to: squeevil
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 5:19pm

I think

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