totally confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2004
totally confused
3
Thu, 08-26-2004 - 7:08pm
ok ladies i have a big problem there's this guy thats been in my life for 6 years now and during these six years we were seeing eachother on and off.Recently i found out that he has a girlfriend and it really hurt to know.I told him that i wasn't comfortable with the situation and decided that we should remain friends, but i ask the question what about me?I love him with all of my heart and soul he means everything in this world to me and i can't imagine being without him. I'm so heart broken over the situation because i feel as if all these years that i have loved him has been a waste- i've always forgiven him when he hurt me in the past basically i have always been there for him besides the times when we are not speaking and he says that's when he usually get a girlfriend around the times when i'm not there for him.But what do i do, do i fight for him or let it go? someone please HELP!!!!!!


Edited 8/26/2004 7:53 pm ET ET by cherish12083
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2004
Thu, 08-26-2004 - 7:23pm
keep him
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Thu, 08-26-2004 - 8:35pm
Basically, you've been a second course to this guy for 6 years and you've been his dormat for the same amount of time. Why do you want to forgive so many times? Remember that "first time shame on you BUT second time shame on me". Why do you want to keep a man who only remembers you when he's in a bad shape? You're not valuing yourself as a woman who deserves to be treated with love and respect. This man doesn't respect you at all, he walks all over you. After all this time you know that you've wasted valuable time and effort in a man with no character. In his book, he can do this because he knows that you'll take him back every time. Move on.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Fri, 08-27-2004 - 4:51am
I totally agree with ccruise2001, I am actually in a similar situation where the person I liked so much is making me feel bad and question my self worth. Its not healthy to put you through this, it destroys your self-esteem, makes you feel depressed. I know its hard to move on, but this time I can't stay around and live on the false hopes anymore. I cant imagine myself being like this in 3 years time, so why not move on now? There are millions of guys out there, its got to be another that would treat you like a princess. Even if there's no guys right now, the day will come when you are finally happy with another man, a better man. :) Take care!

It's probably the hardest thing to do, but I guess we just have to keep trying, keep telling yourself that you deserve so much more. Believe it or not, the next one will be better.