unsure

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
unsure
1
Mon, 05-15-2006 - 11:01pm
Well I need some advice on what to do.I now realize that I like this guy that use to live here in Albuquerque 4 years ago.At the time back then I was with my now ex so I didn't think about him in 'that'way.Now it's 4 years later..he's now been living in California for a few years now.I've kept intouch with him all this time at first through e-mail and recently by talking on the phone(it was once a week).Well he wanted me to visit him sometime this month.This was when we were talking more last month.Well I've been divorced now for a little over 5 months now and I didn't jump at the chance to visit him because I felt that it was too soon to see him and I was still reeling from my divorce.Well I didn't hear from him until a few days ago through e-mail saying that when I'm ready to really talk that I should let him know.All this time when I didn't hear from him I became very worried.It was also then that I realized that I really like this guy and now I feel that I screwed up any chances of at least having a chance to get to be with him now for a potential relationship.... maybe?I think about him alot.What do I do?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: honestgirl31
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 1:36pm

honestgirl31...

First...Pianoguy doesn't think you "screwed up" anything! You merely allowed time to elapse between your divorce and the prospect of dating again!

So STOP BEATING UP ON YOURSELF, okay?

If you want to make the trip to California...check your calendar, call the gentleman who wants to see you and arrange for a convenient time when the two of you can be together! It would certainly help if HE had "time off from work" so he could provide full attention to you. But if this isn't possible, you might want to ask how much time the 2 of you will actually spend with each other before you purchase a plane ticket?

Don't expect anything more than a good week together! If you have "happily ever after long-term desires", don't even bother going!!! The only way 2 people who haven't seen each other in awhile can tell if there's "real chemistry" between them----is to see how well each other's 'elements' blend together?

Now...go check your 'availability date calendar' and then...make the phone call!

Best wishes and warm thoughts...

Pianoguy