Update: he called...still confused?!

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Registered: 05-23-2003
Update: he called...still confused?!
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 11:36am
I wrote yesterday about having a fun first date and wondering about calling...okay, so all of you were right about just waiting. He called last night, totally typically 3 days after the date, etc.

The conversation went really well, we seem to hit it off again, lots of laughing. As I mentioned, he lives about 45 minutes away from me, which to me doesn't seem like a big deal and it's easy for him to come into the city (as he did last weekend). He stayed with good friends, so it took the pressure of both of us as far as arrangements. That being said, this was only one fun date, so I would totally understand him not necessarily wanting to hike it back into the city again this weekend (this can add up, and is definitely a big time commitment)

Okay, that being said (ha) he started asking what I was up to this weekend. Well, I have definite plans on Friday and said so. I don't have definite plans on Saturday there are a few invitations/options but of course I was open to seeing what he was up to. Well, he kind of circled around me coming to visit/hanging out, was asking if I had both Sat and Sun free, etc. He was casually inviting me and said out loud that it was a bit of a commitment to ask someone to do that (45 min drive), and that he couldn't pick me up. No problem, I have a car. Then after a few minutes of talking about it he said he was feeling awkward. I don't know when it took this turn because I didn't think it was awkward at all (after all, we were just kind of figuring it out)...then he started saying the whole, well, we'll see, you never know what could happen with the weather (he lives on the beach), blah blah, he was like...can I give you a call Friday to talk about it and see what we think then. I was really honest with him and said weather can change last minute, that obviously people still hang out when it's raining BUT that he shouldn't be concerned if he wants to just hang out and kind of uninvite me there is no pressure. I seriously mean this, as I have plenty to do always, am incredibly independent and again, though we had a great time on the date, we still don't know each other that well.

Okay, no matter what happens, I am curious...why did he bother calling? Sure, I would've been disappointed had he not, but now I'm just confused. He knew when he called that there was the distance factor, that didn't change during the course of the conversation so what did? At first, he seemed all for talking about plans and then he seemed to kind of not be able to deal. Do you think it was just too much pressure? He mentioned that it was a lot to ask for me to come visit him....but again, did he not review this in his head before calling? If/when he does call on Friday do I just say that I'm busy Saturday and we'll try for another time. His one friend made a point of telling me last week that he is a great guy but one of the most disorganized guys he knows and doesn't plan for things very well so it was a big deal that he came to town to see me. Confused again!