What are we? Im afraid to ask

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2004
What are we? Im afraid to ask
2
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 12:20am
Hello All;

Well, here is a rundown of my situation. I have been dating a guy for about 2.5 months. We met in a typical movie scenario... You know, eyes locked, bla bla bla. When we met we both had just gotten out of relationships. Him 2 months prior, and me 3 months prior. We get a long great. He's definitely a good person. There have been times where I question if he likes me or not, but I have been reassured by him, and his friends that he does. My concerns are of "What we are" I would love to be his girlfriend. We act like boyfriend and girlfriend when we are together, and all his friends call me his girlfriend, sometimes he has slipped and called me his girlfriend, but I am too nervous to hear something I do not want to hear.

I am trying not to make the typical "girl" mistakes. LIke being to clingy (which he pointed out that I sometimes do) and not seeing each other often, (he is a cop and works in my precinct, so we tend to run into each other quite often.) I just really like him a lot, but fear of getting hurt is preventing me from asking. Sometimes he kids around and says things that make me believe we are girlfriend and boyfriend, and then he will just re-neg a previous statement that assures me that we are not. Please help. I do not know what to do or say...

Thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 9:12am
nadiam2003...

Maybe you should commit some sort of a felony in his district and let him "arrest you?" At least you'd have his attention!

Seriously...it seems that he needs to make a few moves on his side. And if you made yourself invisible (with no contact at all)...I'll bet he'd "track you down" and wonder what you've been up to?

Besides...he the policeguy..and aren't most officers are expected to do follow-ups on the cases they're assigned to...or are "interested in?" Good luck!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 10:38am
You mentionned that both of you had just gotten out of relationships when you met. How long was his? I wonder because he might be dating three of you, tell all three of you that you're clingy because he might just want to play the field for awhile.

Have a conversation with him where you ask him what his objective is. If you're sleeping with him, you certainly have a right to know if he's at least thinking short term, sexually exclusive or if he's just playing the field right now and you can make your decision.